She hummed. “Okay. There’s this nice place not too far from your office. The food is good, and it has a good view. Let me text you the name and address, okay?”
“Sure.”
We cut the call, and a minute later I had the information.
There was still time, and after a quick second, I decided I might as well get something done in the time before she showed up. I called my secretary to clear two hours for me for lunch. I didn’t think the talk would take that long, but I might drive around before I returned to the office.
Before I knew it, the time for us to meet had arrived. I got another text from Rachel telling me she was on her way, that she was excited.
I did feel a little sad about what I was going to do today, but not enough to back out.
The place wasn’t that far. The drive in the light, mid-day traffic took me ten minutes, and I made my way to the restaurant. Rachel had still arrived before I did. She saw me first and waved, and I went to join her.
“I had them take back the menus,” she explained, when I saw our table was empty. “I already know what you like so I ordered for you. Trust me; you’re going to love it.”
I didn’t say anything, but I was bothered. She had done this for me before, and I never thought much about it, but I wondered now if there was a meaning behind it that I had missed before.
“We need to talk, Rachel,” I said, cutting off whatever else she was going to say.
She blinked at me. “About the proposal? Well, I was hoping we could talk about it…”
I shook my head. “Not that, Rachel. I meant, we need to talk about us.”
That quieted her up. She was surprised; then she smiled at me. She looked happy, and I felt a spike of guilt again.
“You want to talk about us?”
“Specific enough. What I want, Rachel is for you to leave me alone.”
The smile froze on her face, before quickly dropping. Her face paled, eyes wide in shock. She opened and closed her mouth several times before she found her voice.
“What… Joshua, what do you mean?”
I leaned back in my seat and crossed my arms over my chest.
“I…consider you a friend, Rachel,” I started slowly. “And not a very close one at that, but still a friend. We’ve also talked business between our parent's companies before, and I do appreciate our talks, but anything outside of business…”
She cut me off. “Wait a minute. Joshua, I’m sorry, but have I done or said something wrong?”
“It’s not anything you’ve said or done, Rachel. It is probably your expectations of me.”
“But I don’t have any—” she said, voice high and defensive.
I held up a hand and cut her off. Her mouth snapped closed, and she stared at me. She was shaking a little.
My voice gentled a bit. “Mom has probably told you about how she wished for you and I to get married, hasn’t she, Rachel?”
For a long moment, she didn’t have any reaction, but then she nodded.
“You do know that’s not going to happen, right? I’m not going to marry you, Rachel. I never had the intention to. And when we talked before, I figured you got it.”
“Why not, though?” she argued. “I would be perfect for you in ways that she could never be. I understand the world you currently live in, if you have problems at work, you can talk them out with me, and I’ll be more understanding of any of it than anyone because I was raised with the same expectations that you were.”
I slowly shook my head and saw her expression crumple.
“But…”
“I’m in love with someone else, Rachel. You’ve always known that, too. And there’s no way I can marry you while I love someone else, no matter what you and my mom talk about. Stop listening to everything she tells you. Find your mom, talk to her, and don’t overthink about becoming in-laws with my mother, because it’s never going to happen.”