“You really don’t want to be married to me.” She said it like an impossibility, a puzzle she couldn’t work out.
I lifted my brows, forcing myself to look into her eyes. Forcing myself to remain in the present and not get sucked down into the darkness of my past.
“Is that a problem?”
Her raven hair swayed around her lovely face as she shook her head. “No. It’s just… This isn’t what I expected. You’re not how I expected.”
I shrugged. “I’m a bachelor. I’ve never wanted to be married.”
“Why?” That guileless gaze nearly had me coming undone, nearly had my secrets spilling from my lips.
I bit down hard enough to taste copper on my tongue.
“Never mind why. Just know that I want to live separate lives as soon as possible. So, start planning that party. It’ll help our image, and it’ll further prove to Stefano that you’re loyal to the cartel. It might help with your friends too.”
She stiffened slightly at the mention of her friends. “And how will I plan this party without access to my phone or the internet?”
I hardened my heart. “The same way you planned the wedding. Under supervision.”
She slapped her hands against the countertop and shot to her feet. “Is this my life now? Constantly under guard, constantly watched?”
I crossed my arms over my chest. The pretty little traitor would get no pity from me. “Until you earn my trust, yes. You can do whatever you want, go wherever you want. But you will be under guard until I know that you won’t try anything stupid again.”
Her eyes narrowed. “So, I am your captive, then.”
Captive. She might as well have punched me in the jaw. My body responded with a rush of aggression, as though I was under physical attack. All the impotent rage that’d tormented me as a boy ripped through my system, flooding my chest until I didn’t have any room for kindness or reason. My fists curled at my sides, and I saw red.
“You are not a captive!” I shouted. “You don’t have the first fucking clue what that means, what it’s like to have all your rights stripped away. Don’t you fucking call me your captor. Not ever.”
She cringed away from me, wrapping her arms around her slender body as though to protect herself. Her eyes were fixed on my fists, and her lush lips trembled with fear.
Something dark and ugly mingled with the toxic rage that pulsed through my veins. She was terrified of me. She thought of me as her captor, and she thought I would beat her in my fury.
She thought I was like him.
I barked out a curse and turned away, needing to tear my eyes from her shaking, frail form. I was the one causing her fear. I had to leave before I said something I’d regret.
Hating this marriage, I stormed out of the kitchen, leaving my young wife alone and scared.
CHAPTER 11
ISABEL
Rafael Acosta was a huge brute of a man, and he was officially my new, hulking shadow. He’d shown up at the house shortly after Sebastián had stormed out of the kitchen in a rage, leaving me shocked and speechless. And more than a little scared of his volatility.
One minute, he’d calmly spoken about throwing a party. The next, he’d been shouting at me. His temper was terrible to behold, and for a moment, I’d expected him to hit me.
That was what men did when I angered them. Usually, I tried not to trigger them, but all my instincts were messed up when it came to Sebastián. Maybe it was because he’d protected me once. Something about him had burrowed into my mind: the dangerous idea that he wouldn’t hurt me, no matter what I did.
He hadn’t hit me this morning, but I was sure it’d been close. I bit my lip. I had to be more careful around my volatile new husband. I was no longer free to live my life as I wished, and I loathed him for that. Still, it wasn’t wise for me to needle him, no matter how much I hated this marriage. No matter how much I hated him: the man I’d kissed last night. My enemy. My husband.
My cheeks burned at the memory of how I’d melted in his arms. Every time he held me so tenderly, I stupidly forgot that he was a cold-blooded killer, a monster.
I’m not a monster, Isabel. My heart twinged as I remembered the pain in his eyes. That was what had broken down my walls last night. Some part of me had foolishly thought him vulnerable, and I’d wanted to soothe him.
Then he’d torn himself away from me, breaking the kiss as though I’d burned him.
And this morning, he’d been aloof at first. Then terrifying in his rage.
I couldn’t make sense of the mercurial man I’d married. The man I was now shackled to forever.