Wendy laughed. “My mother never understood it either.”
Selden’s lips curled into a sardonic smile. She’d never noticed his mouth before. His lips were plump and curved, like two reddish-pink pillows. I could kiss that mouth, she suddenly thought.
“I know what you’re going through,” he said. He ran his hand over his head, pushing a piece of hair behind his ear. He smiled. There was another flash of sexual tension. Was it because she was suddenly available? Was she giving off some kind of scent? “You feel like your insides are filled with broken glass,” he said.
She nodded. Yes, that was exactly how she felt. It was such a relief to know that she wasn’t alone. She wasn’t a freak.
“It’s hard, but this is what you have to do,” he said. “You have to make a decision and stick with it. And then move on. No matter how bad you feel, even if he wants to come back, and he will, you stick to your decision. Once someone has betrayed you, they’ll always betray you again.”
She said nothing, staring into his eyes, and for a second, she held her breath. Then he picked up his fork. “That’s a lesson I learned the hard way,” he said.
“You always think life is going to get easier when you get older, but it doesn’t,” she said, trying to act like everything was normal.
“No, it doesn’t, does it?” he said. He looked up, and gave her a smile that was so filled with sadness, she nearly gasped.
She took a bite of her roast beef instead. Chewing self-consciously, she thought about how crazy it was, that you could think you knew a person and be totally wrong. Selden Rose had experienced pain. Why had she never considered that before? And he probably felt the same way about her.
It could be her imagination, but it struck her that she and Selden were really very much alike.
What would it be like to be married to Selden Rose? she wondered.
They finished their lunch, and went down in the elevator together.
Selden started talking about a TV show he was working on. Wendy nodded enthusiastically, but she wasn’t really listening. What if, she wondered, by some bizarre twist of fate, she and Selden got together? Before this, they always hated each other, but what if it had been due to the fact that they were secretly attracted to each other? You did hear about these kinds of things happening. Mostly in movies, of course. But that didn’t mean it couldn’t happen in real life.
She bit the inside of her lip. If it was true, it would make the whole Shane fiasco make sense. Everybody said that it took years to get over a divorce, but what if it didn’t? What if you met the next right person right away and began a new, happy, better life? Where was it written that you had to suffer? She was a good person. She was loving. Why shouldn’t she have the big, loving, giving life she’d always dreamed of?
The elevator slid to a stop. “Thanks for lunch,” Selden said casually.
Was there a hint of something more in his voice? she wondered. “No problem,” she said.
And then Selden did something. He took a step forward and gave her a hug.
She stiffened. Her breasts were squished right up against his chest. Could he feel them too? Oh no. What if he got a hard-on?
What if he didn’t?
“If you need a lawyer, call me,” he said.
She nodded, her eyes wide open with shock. She started to take a step back, but a piece of Selden’s mysterious new, long hair got caught in her glasses. She jerked her head to the side and her mouth practically landed on his neck.
“I’m sorry . . .” she murmured, quickly pulling back. Her glasses fell off and landed on the floor.
Selden bent down and picked up her glasses, handing them to her with a shake of his head. “It’s my fault,” he said, brushing back that lock of hair. Selden Rose didn’t have hair like that before. Had he had it straightened? she wondered curiously.
She replaced the glasses on her nose and their eyes met.
There it was again! Sex!
Thankfully, the elevator door opened and she got out.
She walked down the hallway, her heart pounding in her throat. What had just happened? Something had, she was sure of it. And with Selden Rose! She must really be going insane. She was a grown woman—the president of Parador Pictures, for Christ’s sake—and here she was, acting like a silly schoolgirl. But that was the unavoidable part about being a woman, the part no one really understood. No matter how old you got, despite the fact that “you knew better,” you could still be reduced to a giggling teenager when faced with a sexy man at a vulnerable moment. It was about hope, she supposed.
Hope, and the all-too-human belief that it was possible to go back and try again, she thought, walking into her office. And maybe get it right for a change.
Chapter 7
THE PAST THI