It’s unfair. It’s just wrong, and I’m going to convince the judge of that. I may be scared. I may not be a lawyer or have one. But I know in my heart that Shanna belongs with me, and I’m not giving her up without a fight. I’m going to get ready for the most important battle of my life.
I step away from my dad and meet his gaze with renewed confidence and determination.
“I’m not going to let anyone take Shanna from us, Dad.”
~
I’ve done my research. I’ve prepared my arguments. I’ve convinced myself that I’m the best person to fight for Shanna because I know and love her best. I’ve promised my dad I’ll do my best. I’m here at court early. I ate breakfast. I’m all dressed up.
Even so, doubts begin to nibble at me as I sit at the front of the courtroom. I start to feel nervous.
What if I say the wrong things? What if Alice asks me questions I can’t answer? What if the judge thinks I’m not the right person to take care of Shanna?
I look at the benches behind me. They’re empty. I’m the first one here and I’m all alone. My dad is taking care of Shanna. Emily isn’t here yet, though she promised she would be. Knowing her, she’ll make her entrance right before the hearing starts. And there’s no sign of Dax.
Of course not. He isn’t my boyfriend anymore, after all, and I haven’t had the chance to clear the air between us yet. Lately, with all the preparation I’ve had to do for this hearing, I haven’t even thought about him much or had the chance to miss him.
I do now, though. I miss him. I wish he were here. Just knowing he’s here to support me would have given me the strength I need right now. It would have made me feel like I could win.
Well, I’ll just have to win this without him. After all, I’m sure he’d be upset if we got back together and he found out I lost Shanna.
I face the podium and draw a deep breath.
You can do this, Jenna.
Then I hear the door open and footsteps behind me. I turn my head and see Alice. She smiles.
Is she smiling because she’s trying to be nice? Or because she’s confident she’ll win?
The other woman doesn’t smile. As soon as our eyes meet, she looks away and purses her lips. I can’t remember what Tom looked like so I can’t tell if she looks like him, but she has a square face and shoulder-length blonde hair. She has a mole to the right of her nose.
My eyebrows crease. Wait. I think I’ve seen her before. If I remember correctly, she’s been to the library once or twice.
My gaze goes to her dress – black with pink and white tulips.
Tulips? Wait a minute. She’s not the one who’s been sending packages with tulips, is she?
If so, it would make sense that she knows Shanna’s name and Sarah’s favorite flower. Maybe they’ve met before. It would make sense that she’s cared about Shanna all along, though I don’t understand why she never came forward.
And here’s something else I don’t understand. Why is she trying to get Shanna now, when for the past year, she’s been trusting me to take care of her? What made her think I’m no longer capable of taking care of her niece? Is it because of Dax, who she seems to disapprove of? Is it because she found out I’m adopted?
I guess I’ll find out soon enough.
I’m feeling more anxious now. If Barbara is the Tulip Lady, then she’s been watching over me and Shanna. That used to be a good thing, but is it going to work against me now?
I try to think of anything I could have done that she could use against me. The times I had to run to the grocery at night because Shanna ran out of diapers. The times I couldn’t make Shanna stop crying. The times she got sick or hurt. The times I didn’t have money to buy her nice things.
Fuck. I’m in trouble.
I try to keep calm, though. When the judge enters the room, I stand up and try to keep my knees from shaking.
The judge is a man in his fifties. Judge Rudolph Stanley. And here I was hoping for someone younger, and a woman.
He sits down and turns to the other side of the room.
“Mrs. Keating, you’re here to petition custody for your niece, Shanna Holt?”
“Yes, Your Honor,” she answers.
“And your counsel is Alice McCarthy?”
Barbara nods. “Yes.”
The judge turns to me. “Ms. Holt?”
I stand up. “Yes, sir, I mean Your Honor.”
Get it together, Jenna.
“I understand you have current custody of your niece?”
I push my glasses up my nose. “Yes, Your Honor.”
“You look young. Do you have a job?”