“And Ash?”
“He’s very happy. A bit scared he won’t be a good dad, because of his own father, but still. In fact…” She lifts her hand for me to see, and I notice what I didn’t notice in all the hubbub. A slender golden ring.
“He proposed?” I squeak. All my woes forgotten, I grab her in my arms. “Of course he did. This is crazy.”
“It’s not expensive,” she squeaks. “The ring, I mean. It’s just—”
“Christ, who cares? Who the hell cares how expensive it is? Jesus.” I shake her lightly. “You said yes?”
“Of course I said yes. I love him so much, how could I not? Jesus, Tess, I’m going to be Mrs. Devlin.”
Now we’re laughing together, and we sort of fall back on the sofa to stare up at the ceiling.
“That’s amazing,” I whisper after a while. “I mean it. I’m so fucking happy for you both.”
She turns and gives me a sweet smile. “Thank you.”
This is what she wants for me, this happiness. And I want it, too, but the one man I want it with doesn’t feel the same way.
Sadness returns to roost in my thoughts, and by the time Asher deems it safe to return to the living room, accepts my congratulations and tells me we should get ready to head to the police station and request a restraining order for Sean, I’m somberly trying to imagine a future that doesn’t include Dylan.
Chapter Ten
Dylan
Damn, why won’t Tessa tell me where she is? Let me go to her and make sure she’s okay? I feel like my skull is about to burst from the worry. I dig my thumbs into my eyes, as if that can make the headache go away.
I try calling her back, but no reply. Shit. I’m gonna kill that fucker for hurting her again. For scaring her.
“Dylan?” Teo is standing at the kitchen door, clutching Gino, his teddy.
“Go to bed, little man,” I bite out and struggle for control because I want to punch something and now is not the time. “I’m coming to tuck you in.”
As soon as he’s out of the room, I kick the table leg and bend over, bracing my hands on the scarred surface, trying to calm down. She doesn’t want me there with her. This sucks.
No. I’m not gonna lose Tessa. Not gonna happen.
Isn’t it too late to worry about that? a snide voice in my head whispers, and I let out a long breath.
I need to see her. To hell with it.
So I arrange for Charlie to keep an eye on the boys until I’m back. I tuck Teo in and promise to read him his favorite book another time, make sure Miles knows what to do if anything happens, that he has my number and won’t open the door to stranglers, all the while feeling like I’m slogging through quicksand.
Fuck, I can’t afford this now, this bone-deep exhaustion that’s hounding me. It feels like forever until I organize everything and call a cab to take me to Tessa.
Sitting in the back seat, I allow myself to lean back and close my eyes for one brief minute. I keep hearing her frightened voice telling me she found her creepy ex-boyfriend waiting for her at her apartment, and I wanna wring the motherfucker’s neck.
Fuck, fuck. If I’d known…
My anger rouses me, and I look out the cab window as we arrive at Audrey and Asher’s place. I pay and step outside. The cold bores into my bones, making my joins ache and creak. I ring the bell and shift from foot to foot, clenching my frozen hands inside my pockets. Feels like snow.
Feels like darkness and despair.
I shake my head to dispel the morose thoughts and ring again. Shit, it’s cold.
“Who is it?” Asher’s voice comes through the intercom.
“It’s me, Dylan. Can I come up?” He says nothing, so I say through chattering teeth, “I’m here to see Tessa.”