"I better keep my mind on the business at hand," Robert said.
"Just let out a little line, Robert, and she won't spill us into the sea."
"Aye, aye, Captain."
We sailed on, the wind whipping the sail, the bow cutting into the waves. We were going at a good clip and as we made the turn around another bend of shore the wind died a bit and the ride became slower, smoother. Robert grew more confident.
"This isn't as hard as everyone makes it out to be," he declared.
"Don't get too arrogant, Robert," I warned. "It takes a while to become as good a sailor as Cary. Cary says the sea doesn't easily forgive mistakes, either."
"I know, but I do have a flair for it, don't I, Laura?" he asked, fishing for a compliment. "Well? Don't I?"
"Yes, yes." I laughed. We kissed again and sailed on. Finally, I felt relaxed and happy.
Perhaps all of our lives will be like this now, I thought. We'll round another bend and find sunshine and happiness. With the wind in my hair and Robert's arms around me as our sailboat sliced through the water, it was easy to believe in fairy tales. Cary and I had grown up with faith in the magic of the ocean. Who could blame me for wanting Robert to share it as well?
Who would ever blame me as much as I would soon blame myself?
9
Swept Away
.
For a long time, I had no memory of that fateful
afternoon. My mind locked it in a dark closet and threw away the key. As hard as it is to believe, I even forgot Robert's name.
I was lying comfortably in his arms as he turned the sailboat toward the shore. The cove was small, with just a patch of beach, really, but he had discovered it and claimed it as our special place. When we drew closer, I sat up. The wind had grown a bit stronger and the clouds flowing in from the south now looked a bit darker and thicker. I should have said, "Let's go back, Robert," right then and there, but I didn't. I, too, was hungry for love and I, too, was titillated by the prospect of our own private little world.
Robert leaped out of the sailboat and guided it onto the shore. Then he reached for my hand and I stepped out. He found a piece of driftwood nearby and planted it in the sand. Then he tied his handkerchief around it so it flapped in the wind like a flag.
"I claim this beach for Laura Logan and hereby name it Laura's Cove," he said, standing proud and strong like some historic explorer. I laughed and clapped my hands. He took a sweeping bow and I laughed again. Everything made me laugh that afternoon. All of it, the air, the freedom, the renewal of love and promises had made me giddy. I was drunk on dreams.
"We have to christen our piece of paradise," he declared and stepped up to me.
He embraced me and kissed me full on the lips. The wind whipped my hair and the sea spray felt cool and refreshing on my arms and neck.
"I missed you," he said. "Oh, how I missed you. I kissed you a thousand times in my mind, Laura. I held you every chance I could get."
He kissed me softly on the tip of my nose and then my chin before we joined our lips again. After that, he reached into the sailboat and pulled out the blanket. He spread it out and we embraced and lowered ourselves onto the sand. I lay back against his chest.
"We can't stay long, Robert," I remember saying. "Cary and May--"
"I know," Robert replied and stroked my hair, running his palm over my cheek as if he were blind and committing every feature of my face to his memory forever and ever. I wanted him. Oh, how much I wanted him.
He sensed my desire and began to kiss me on my neck. His hands moved to my waist and he gently pushed up my tank top. In moments we were both nearly undressed, embracing, clinging to each other as if the whole world had become water and we were floating on the surface.
"I will not let anyone take you from me," he whispered, "even for a short time."
His words filled my heart and drove away all the doubts about our love, about myself, about what and who we were. Yes, I heard myself begin somewhere deep down inside my very soul, yes, yes, yes.
Our kisses were long and hard and hungry, the kisses of two loving people who had been locked away from that love for too long. I don't even remember how we became totally naked, but we were, and without hesitation, almost without skipping a beat, we were making love, throwing all caution to the wind that whirled around us.
It began with a maddening rush and then slowed to an undulating rhythm that took me up and down, to heights and ecstasy and moments of quiet when I could catch my breath; but soon the hunger for another taste of ecstasy overpowered me and I tightened my embrace around him, holding him, refusing to permit it to end.
I remember hearing his small laugh of delight and seeing his face, his eyes full of so much love and pleasure. I told myself what we were doing couldn't be anything but good and beautiful. He smothered me in kisses; he chanted my name; he quieted my small cries and held me as tightly as I held him. We rode on each other's passion until we were exhausted.