"If you lose that, don't come running back here for more. Make your way on your wits," she commanded. She sat again, folding her hands and leaning forward. "I expect to hear from you as soon as you confirm something and some decision is made on your future, especially if you are coming back here."
I nodded.
"Thank you," I said.
She leaned back.
"Did it ever occur to you that even if that is your mother, she might not be worth finding? If she wanted you to know she was alive, she would have called to tell you, wouldn't she?"
"I don't know," I said. "That's why I want to go."
She smirked and then looked up at me with an expression that bordered on concern and friendliness.
"I'll give you this advice: if someone's drowning and you can't save her, you'll only drown yourself as well if you don't let go," she said.
No one was more of an expert when it came to saving herself, I thought, but I didn't say it. I held her gaze for an instant and then turned to leave.
"May I ask you when you were born? The month, day, year?" Holly asked Grandma Olivia. "You may not. That's impertinent."
"You were born between November twentysecond and December twenty-first," Holly replied, undaunted. Grandma Olivia's eyes widened and she looked at me. She must have thought I had given Holly the correct information.
"I don't know why I care, but what is that supposed to mean if it's so?"
"That you're a Sagittarius," Holly replied.
"Whatever that may mean to you, it means nothing to me," Grandma Olivia said.
Holly smiled as if she thought that was exactly what a Sagittarius like Grandma Olivia would say.
Grandma Olivia then saw to it that my two small suitcases were brought back down.
"I had had them placed in what was your mother's room," she told me at the door. "Somehow, I think you will be back."
Holly and I put my bags in her car and drove away.
"You were right," she said after a few minutes of deep silence, "she's definitely not like everyone's little old grandmother."
I started to smile and then thought about Cary.
"I have one more good-bye before we leave, Holly," I said.
"I know. I'll drop you off at the house and go get my things. Then we'll be off."
I sucked in my breath, closed my eyes, and prayed for the right words to help Cary understand the things that I didn't understand myself.
Aunt Sara and May were surprised, but happy to see me return. They were preparing dinner. Even though Cary had not come in from the sea yet, Uncle Jacob had apparently gone back upstairs to his room.
"I had a very difficult time of it," Aunt Sara said in a loud whisper, her eyes shifting toward the ceiling. "It took nearly fifteen minutes to get him up the stairs. He had to keep catching his breath. He's very upset about it. Do you have a nice room at Olivia's?" she asked with a sad smile.
"She's giving me my mother's old room," I said. "Oh. That's very nice. I remember that room. It's airy and the windows face the sea."
"But first I have to take a trip, Aunt Sara."
"A trip? Where?"
I told her, but instead of surprising and exciting her, the news made her sad and withdrawn. She lowered her eyes and went back to her work.
"I'll come see you as soon as I return," I promised and threw my arms around her before giving her a good-bye kiss on the cheek.