"She doesn't know she has it," he said.
"Yes, she does."
He shook his head at me with a look of pity on his face. "And then, I kissed her for you," I said.
His arrogant, confident expression faded.
And for a moment, he looked more like a little boy than my older brother.
18 Too Old for a Nanny
. Neither Ian nor I had any idea how much Grandmother Emma had already done and decided about us before we even had arrived at the hospital. Ian said she could easily have been a Nazi U-boat commander because she was so decisive and unemotional when she made a decision.
"She must have been thinking about all this even while she was rushing to the hospital and especially when she learned about Father's and Mother's injuries,'" he told me afterward.
Strangely enough, he didn't sound angry or critical about it. To me, he even seemed a little in awe of Grandmother Emma. Even though in his mind she was the cause of it all, his respect for her grew. She was all business and no nonsense, he told me, as if he were speaking about a superhero.
I had already been thinking about her in a similar way. I knew she didn't care that much for Mama, but why wasn't she at least sadder about all that had happened to Daddy? Did she ever cry? Or did she do all her crying in secret, behind locked doors? Was it shameful or unladylike to shed tears in public about your own son's pain and trouble?
On the other hand. Ian hadn't cried either. I thought, He was thinking and acting like another doctor and not like a son.
Would he, too, cry in secret?
Apparently, while we were on our way to the hospital, at the hospital, and returning back to the house
. Nancy had been very busy following Grandmother Emma's new orders. She moved everything of mine from my room to the room that had been Daddy's, the room right across from Grandmother Emma's bedroom. All my clothes, shoes, underwear, toiletries, toys, books, and games were transferred, as well as my school desk. Until we arrived at the house and walked in with her, Grandmother Emma didn't tell me and Ian what she had ordered Nancy to do.
Nancy greeted us in the hallway.
"Is everything done?" Grandmother Emma said before Nancy could ask about my parents.
"Yes, Mrs. March."
"Good." She turned to me. "Jordan," she said, "you will be living and sleeping in your father's old bedroom for now. Ian, you are to remain where you are and not come to that side of the house unless I specifically ask you to do so."
Of course, I was totally surprised, as was Ian. I couldn't help feeling frightened and nervous about being uprooted like this, but I was also intrigued about being in Daddy's room and on Grandmother Emma's side of the house.
Both Ian and I hurried up the stairs and looked in at my room. Even the bedding had been stripped and taken to Daddy's old bed. Apparently Nancy had turned the mattress because there in plain sight were the stains from my first period. The sight of the emptied room as well as that gave me a chilling feeling.
"Holy schmnoly," Ian said. This was also when he called her a U-boat commander.
"This way," Grandmother Emma called to me. She was standing at the head of the stairs, about midway down the hall, beckoning. "Don't dillydally. All of your things have been moved. Don't worry. We have much to do. You can go to your room, Ian."
I looked at Ian. He lowered his head and walked to his own bedroom and shut the door.
"Come along," Grandmother Emma said.
I followed her down the corridor to her side of the mansion and paused at the open doorway to Daddy's old room. I looked in at my bedding, my desk, my toy chest, pictures on the walls, and other things.
"Where are Daddy's things?" I asked.
"Never mind about that. Go on," she said, urging me into the bedroom.
Daddy's old bed was as big as mine, but it was made of a darker wood as were all the furnishings. The room itself was larger, but the windows looked out in the same direction as mine did. I knew Nancy cleaned the room periodically, but it smelled like she had just polished all the furniture, vacuumed, and washed the windows.
The tub in the bathroom was larger and, Grandmother Emma explained, had a whirlpool as well. She showed me where all my things had been placed in the cabinets, including my medicine. As she explained it all to me, a thought came.
"What if Mama doesn't want me to move into this bedroom?" I asked.