"Why were you crying in the car?" I asked her.
"Adult talk, honey. Don't worry about it," she said. "Happy birthday and many, many more." She kissed my cheek, fixed the blanket, and left, switching off my light.
I really wasn't tired. I thought I would be, but my mind wouldn't stop twirling and spinning, thinking about the events of the whole exhausting day. I remembered my present from Ian and got out of bed to take it out of the toy chest. Then I went back to bed, switched on my night lamp, and slowly turned the pages. The girl in the book was older than I was. She had just had her twelfth birthday and had all sorts of questions about herself. I skipped ahead.
I couldn't help looking at the tadpoles. I wondered if females felt them swimming around inside them. How long did they swim? Where did they go if and when they missed the egg? There was so much to know. Would the book tell me everything?
A whole new world had suddenly opened in front of me just because things had happened in my body that weren't supposed to happen for a while yet, maybe for years and years.
Why did Grandmother Emma say I would break hearts and what did she mean when she told my parents to gird their loins? Would that be in the book? Why was Mama angry about a new floor manager? How could that be adult talk? Did Ian know the answers? How was I supposed to fall asleep ever again with all this bouncing about in my head?
I finally did though. The words and pictures grew fuzzier and fuzzier until I couldn't keep my eyelids from shutting. I fell asleep with the book opened and sprawled over me, which was a big mistake because Mama was in my room before I woke up and found it. I felt her lift it off me and look at it.
"Where did you get this?" she asked as I opened my eyes and sat up. "Jordan?"
Now Ian was going to be angry at me. I thought. I ruined a secret and I had made him a promise, taken an oath. He would stop coming about me again. Could I lie?
"I found it," I said.
She smirked. "Jordan. I asked you a question. I know this book was nowhere in this house. I want an honest answer."
I started to cry. "I wasn't supposed to tell you," I said.
She stared, her eyes brightening. "Ian," she said. "Did he give you this? Jordan?"
My answer was written on my face.
"Why did he give you this? How did he find out about you? Did you tell him?"
"He heard about me going to see Dr.
Dell'Acqua and he wanted to know why." I was determined not to tell her anything more about his research and all his "Holy schmolies." "I promised I wouldn't tell you he knew. Now he's going to be mad at me."
She thought a moment. The fear left her face and her body relaxed. Then she smiled. "It's all right. I shouldn't have kept it from him anyway. If anyone in this house is mature enough to understand what's going on, it's Ian. I'll speak to him. He won't be angry at you for telling me. In fact," she said, turning the pages and looking at the pictures and information in the book, "this was a very smart thing for him to do for you."
"It's my birthday present from him," I said.
"Your birthday present?" She looked sad again. "Yes, it's a nice birthday present, only I wish it had been years from now," she muttered.
She looked around my room and pressed her lips together. Then she said a strange thing, whispered it as if she wasn't sure she wanted me to hear it.
"It's this house. Everything changed once we moved here."
She realized I heard her and quickly smiled again. "It's all right, honey. Everything will be all right," she said, and kissed me. "Go on and get up and dressed. There's lots to do before we leave for the lake."
I couldn't help but think about what she had said about the house. Was it true?
She left me listening for the whispering I now thought she surely heard as well.
8 The Sister Project
. Mama did talk to Ian and complimented him on his intelligent birthday present. She explained why she didn't want anyone else to know just yet. However, he wasn't entirely pleased. When he came to my room I had just finished getting dressed. As soon as he came in. I could tell from the expression on his face that he was upset with me and surely thought I had violated our oath.
"I fell asleep with the book on me," I moaned before he could utter a complaint. "Mama came into my room and found it. I didn't show it to her. She made me tell her how I got it, Ian. I swear.
He grimaced. I had still disappointed him. "You can see how important it is to always think first and act second, Jordan. I know you didn't want to break our oath, but there will still be things we'll do that Ed rather we kept secret between us. I'm making you my special project. Jordan," he added to impress me. "I'll still do other things, but you will be the most important. I will call it my Sister Project, okay?"
"Yes," I said, even though I couldn't imagine now why we should keep anything secret from Mama. She had gone to the drugstore to get the medicine Dr. Dell'Acqua had ordered for me. It was a nasal spray and I was to use it every morning. I had to spray twice into each nostril. Mama said she would be sure to remind me and help me do it. Later, Ian came in to see what it was. He copied down the name and quickly returned to his computer to find out