n doing, but something she couldn't discuss. I knew it was not something Dave would have done or would do. If Mama caught me listening in on these conversations, she would either give me a look that said. "Go away," or she would find something for me to do around the house.
Lately every day, in fact. Mama had something for me to get at the mall or shopping centers. She sent me on errands and sent me to make deliveries of her products to Mr. Bogart. Whenever I asked after Dave or volunteered to do something to help him, she found something else she needed done first. Some days I barely set eves on him. One morning I heard the phone ring and overheard Mama tell his store manager that he was finally going to see his physician. She said she would let him know what transpired.
It cheered me to hear that, but the day went by. I completed more errands, and when I returned, she didn't mention Dave's having seen his doctor or planning to do so. I was afraid to tell her that I had earlier eavesdropped on her phone conversation, but I decided that if she didn't say anything about it in the morning. I would confront her.
That night I volunteered to take Daves food up to him. She looked at me strangely, not angrily so much as curiously.
"Why would you want to do that. Noble'?"
"I thought I would take part of the burden off of you. Mama."
She smiled. "That's very thoughtful, but ifs no burden to me. It's better that you keep our Baby Celeste occupied." She took up the tray.
The past few days, she always kept the bedroom door closed. I couldn't even gaze in and perhaps wave to him or ask after his health. I knew better than to protest about it. and I knew I had to ask my questions as casually as possible. I was tiptoeing my words and feelings around her, afraid she would accuse me of something or another.
"How is he?" I did ask when she returned from bringing him his dinner.
"The same." It was all she ever said now, but I knew in my heart that it was not the same.
After dinner, after Baby Celeste went to sleep. I went out despite the freezing temperatures. It was cold enough to see your breath. I wore a sweater, a scarf, and my overcoat and gloves. I just wandered about aimlessly for a while, occasionally gazing up at the sky. The stars looked like beads of ice. Noble used to think they were, and when the sun came up, it melted them, and that was why there were no stars in the daytime. Maybe he was right. I thought.
I walked around the house and looked up at what I knew to be Mamaand Daves room. The light was on, but dimly, and the curtains were drawn.
"Hes dying, you know, " I heard, and turned to look into the darker shadows from which the words had come. "It's what she wants. She has no more use for him."
I said nothing. That voice was too familiar to me. I gazed into the darkness and gradually, gradually Elliot took shape from the shadows.
"I've poisoned the well. I told you I would and there's nothing you can do about it. Noble man," he said gleefully.
Was he there? Did I really hear him?
I stepped toward him and he retreated, falling back into the darkness more and more until he was indistinguishable from it. He's afraid of me. I thought. I am not helpless. I can still do something.
More determined now. I hurried back inside the house. Mama was in the kitchen cleaning up. I heard her mumbling to someone and for a moment that frightened me. The spirits were everywhere. The ones she could see and I couldn't see were surely watching me, watching every step I took. however Elliot's words rang and bonged in my head like a heavy church bell. He's dying She has no more use for him. He's dying.. dying.
I ascended the stairway as quietly as I could, but the house was far more loyal to Mama than it was to me. The steps creaked even more loudly; the balustrade shook and rattled. I paused and listened for her footsteps. All I heard was a low, continuous murmuring coming from the kitchen. She was too involved in what she was saying.
I moved faster and then, again tiptoeing over the upstairs floor, made my way quickly to Mama and Dave's bedroom door. To me it sounded as if I were walking over a pile of loose rocks, no matter how softly I stepped. Once again I paused to listen, and once again I didn't hear her footsteps on the stairway behind me. Carefully, slowly, ever so slowly. I turned the doorknob and opened the door. The hinges, just as loyal to Mama as were the steps and floor. squeaked.
Only a small desk lamp was lit. It cast a giant shadow over the bed, a shadow that looked more like a shroud. Dave's forehead was somewhat illuminated. It looked as yellow as a slab of butter, As I drew closer. I saw that the blanket was up to his chin. A nearly full glass of water was on the night table with a small saucer beside it, a piece of old china rarely if ever used. In it I saw what looked like multicolored crumbs of some herbal substance Mama had created. The spoon beside the saucer indicated she had been giving Dave doses of it.
He was lying so still and staring wide-eyed up at the ceiling as if he saw something astounding. Whatever it was absorbed his full attention because he didn't hear or see me enter the bedroom. I approached the bed and stood beside it, looking down at him. His eyes did not move toward me, although he blinked.
"Dave," I said in a loud, careful whisper. "How are you dom. g?" He continued to stare at the ceiling.
"Dave." I said, reaching down to touch his shoulder. Slowly, ever so slowly, he lowered his eyes and turned them toward me. He had no reaction. He looked at me like someone who wasn't sure I was there, who wasn't sure he had heard me speak. Maybe he thought I was one of Mama's spirits.
"Dave, it's Noble. Can't you hear me? What's wrong with you?" His lips moved slightly and his eyes blinked.
"You've got to go to a hospital right now. Dave. You're very, very sick. Do you understand what I'm saying? I'll take you, okay? Dave?"
His head shook in tiny, almost incremental motions from side to side and his lips moved a little more, but he did not speak. I looked at the saucer, then lifted it and smelled the herbal medications. I had no idea what was in them, but when I looked closely at the glass of water, I saw that it, too, had something mixed in it, the residue of which lay at the bottom of the glass. Also on the nightstand were bottles and tablets of over-the-counter drugs and what looked like something someone would have to get with a prescription.
He had closed his eves again. I shook his shoulder a little more vigorously. "Dave, can you hear me? Do you understand what I'm saying? You're very
He opened his eyes and turned a little more toward me, but his eyes showed no recognition.
I heard a laugh and looked across the room.