I plucked it carefully from her palm and did as she asked. Then I sat back and we both looked at me in the mirror, I could see the look of pleasure settled in Mother's face like strawberries sitting in whipped cream. She bent down to hug me and press her cheek to mine.
"I'm sorry I wasn't there for your growing up. Willow. I should have brought you back here with me. but Mother was sick then. She had been fighting breast cancer for two years and the battle took its toll an her. She was like some beautiful flower, deprived of sunshine and water, fading, crumbling, with only a hint of its former beauty left for someone to see.
"It always bothered me that I wasn't here when she needed me the most in her life, and I regret not being there for you when you needed a real mother."
"You're here now," I said, "And I'm here, and we're together." "I hope it's not too little too late."
"It's not. We have many years to enjoy together," I assured her,
Hearing Linden in the hallway, we both looked through the doorway, I wondered if he had been standing there and listening.
"I'll go spend some time with him," she whispered, and patted my arm. "Don't worry","
She left. and I looked through my wardrobe to find my black shawl. Then I gazed at myself in the mirror again and imagined Daddy standing behind me.
You look very nice, I thought he would say. I hoped he would say. He was never a prude, and with a wife like my adoptive mother, he was used to fashionable clothing and expensive jewelry.
Suddenly. I imagined his smile hardened into that psychiatrist's face of his. Are you sure about all this, Willow?
Sometimes I feel very sure, and then sometimes I don't. Did you ask yourself why that is?
No. but I imagine it's not unusual. Don't we all have doubts when we make big decisions?
His smile softened.
Now who's being the psychiatrist, answering a question with a question?
I had a good teacher.
He laughed, and then his image faded. "Daddy," I whispered to the mirror.
There was only I. looking hard, looking alone,
looking afraid.
.
Linden and Mother were on the loggia when I came out of my room. The door was open. so I could hear their conversation. I heard Linden complain. "I bet you wish you had two daughters."
"Of course not. Why, most married people want to have one of each."
"You weren't married, either time," he said harshly.
"I don't love either of you the less because of that." she said.
"Willow was born out of a love relationship, at least" he muttered bitterly.
"I've told you a hundred times if I've told you once. Linden. I would go through all of it, the pain, the disgrace, the misery, if it meant I would have you."
"You're just saving that because its too late to give me back," he snapped.
"No, that's not so." "Right," he said.
"Hi," chimed in a new voice. It was Thatcher, approaching the house.
Linden rose immediately and came in, moving so fast he almost didn't see me standing in the entry. He stopped short and pulled himself up.
"Your Prince Charming has arrived. Have a good time," he said, and started by me.