"I'll try to do better, but Anita's right--this case has just drained me. I can't seem to get it out of my head, and that is a serious mood killer."
"If Anita releases the ardeur, you'll be in the mood."
"I fed on Jean-Claude before we left, so I don't have to feed, but I can feed again if we all agree to it."
"Do you ever get full from the ardeur, like having too much chocolate cake?" Micah asked.
I smiled. "There's always room for chocolate cake."
Micah smiled back, his eyes filling with heat that had nothing to do with being a wereanimal and everything to do with being lovers. "Yay, cake," he said, his voice low.
Nathaniel stood up and untied the sash of his robe, proving that he was as naked under the robe as I'd thought. "Eat me."
"Before or after I release the ardeur?"
"Yes," he said.
30
MICAH TOOK OFF his robe, too, and the two of them lay down on the bed side by side. They were both strong and fit. Nathaniel lifted more weights, so he had more definition, but Micah was lean enough that what muscle he had showed. He might not lift that much, but he did fight practice more than Nathaniel did. It was like looking at two different male ideals--the fit model and the martial artist. Micah would have argued that he wasn't able to practice as much as some of the guards did, but then, he wasn't a bodyguard. He practiced as much as he did because all wereanimal leaders could be challenged to defend their positions. Sometimes one could choose a champion to fight in his place, but most lycanthrope cultures didn't allow that. I worked out to stay in shape for my job, too, and I was just as likely as Micah was to end up with my physicality being the difference between coming home safe and not coming home at all. We didn't talk about it much because there was no point; it was our reality.
I stood there admiring the view of my two men, and by the time I crawled onto the bed between them their bodies had already started to prove that they were admiring their view of my body, too--or maybe I was being too egocentric, and it was the view of each other's bodies. I didn't care--I loved and desired them both.
"Release the ardeur, Anita," Micah said as he helped Nathaniel pull me down between them.
"Before we've done any foreplay?"
He went up on one elbow, so he was looking down at both of us as we lay looking up at him. "If we get to a certain point and then you release the ardeur, we'll finish like we always do, and that's fabulous, but I'm willing--no, I want--to try something different."
Nathaniel went up on his elbow on the other side of me so he could look across eye to eye with Micah. "We usually release the ardeur when everyone's dick is where they want it for orgasm."
"Which means I'll be in someone's mouth or inside Anita," Micah said.
"I'm okay wherever I end up, and whoever ends up in me," Nathaniel said.
I was left looking from one to the other as they talked over me. I was okay with that; this was more their issue than mine.
"That's not true," Micah said. "I'm too wide even for you to want me to do anal on you."
"But you don't enjoy anal in any way, so unless it's my idea to put you back there, even with the ardeur it won't occur to you."
"I'm sorry that neither of us likes anal," I said.
Nathaniel smiled down at me. "I have other people in my life who do, but it does disappoint me."
"I love you, Nathaniel. I love both of you, and I want to be with you both, really be with you both."
"I love you even more for trying, but if we release all our inhibitions this early, I know what I'm going to want to do, and if we don't use lube, then even the ardeur can't make that part of the body make its own lubrication, which means it may feel good while we're doing it, but once we sober up from the metaphysics it's going to hurt. I do not want the first time we do anal to be painful."
"All right, then let's put lube in first, just in case."
Nathaniel raised his eyebrows at that. "And how do we do that in a way that you'll enjoy?"
"Get the gloves and the lube and I'll explain."
"I should say What a wonderful gesture and talk you out of it," Nathaniel said.
"Why?" Micah asked.
"Because you don't really want to do this, and you're using the ardeur as sort of getting drunk to relax into it."
"I love you. We're getting married. I want to try."
Nathaniel looked down at me. "What do you think?"
"I think we either try it or we do something more normal for us, and think on it some more."
He looked back at Micah. "I really appreciate the offer, Micah. I really do. I love you even more for it, but I want the first time to be special, not a drunken orgy."
"I might not ever be able to do it without the ardeur helping me lower my inhibitions."
"I know that, but let's work on exploring anal with smaller, gentler things before we go for it, even with the ardeur. I love you too much to hurt you. The same goes for you, Anita."
"How did I get into this discussion?"
"You know what they say--everyone has an asshole."
I laughed, because I couldn't think what else to do. "I already have an opening that works just fine for both of you."
"We'll discuss it later," he said, smiling.
"We will, will we?"
He nodded, grinning.
"Well, I don't know about that, but I do know that I want one of you to go down on me, and I want to have both of you in my mouth at least once, and I want you inside me."
"We can do that," Micah said.
31
MICAH PUT ME across his face, so I could look down my body and see his eyes looking up at me as he licked and sucked between my legs. We'd put his hair back in a ponytail to help keep it out
of the way. My hands held on to the headboard, because I couldn't reach anyone else to hold on to. Nathaniel was behind me going down on Micah. I prided myself on having control of my gag reflex for deep throating, but Nathaniel didn't have a gag reflex at all. The only challenge for him with Micah was the width, and even there his mouth was bigger than mine. I looked over my shoulder to try to watch a little of it, but Micah did something with his tongue that made me gasp and turn back to staring down into his chartreuse eyes.
I felt his body shudder and I knew that something that Nathaniel was doing behind me was bringing him close. It almost distracted me from Micah's mouth between my legs, but he was too good at it for me to be distracted for long. He sucked on that sweet spot and I felt that warm weight between my legs growing heavier, and from one movement of his mouth to the next he drew me over the edge and brought me to screaming. I clawed at the headboard and yelled wordlessly, head thrown back. His tongue and mouth kept going until I was trying to find my words to tell him Enough, but I felt his body shudder again, and this time it made his mouth hesitate, lose its rhythm, and I looked down to see his eyes flutter closed, and watched them lose focus, felt his body go from straining to limp, and I knew that Nathaniel had brought him to orgasm, as Micah had brought me.
Nathaniel was suddenly kneeling behind me, his voice growling in my ear. "You didn't release the ardeur."
I managed to shake my head. I was still trying to recover from the afterglow of the orgasm.
He put his lips near my face, so his breath was hot against my skin. "I want you to release it when I'm fucking you."
I nodded, still having trouble talking.
Nathaniel lifted me off Micah and half carried, half dragged me down the bed and put me on all fours so that my knees were between Micah's legs, my arms on either side of his hips. I was suddenly staring down at his groin; his body wasn't completely hard anymore, but he still wasn't small.
I felt Nathaniel pushing himself against my opening. "God, you are so wet. I'm going to fuck you while you lick Micah."
Micah managed to say, "Too sensitive."
"I know," Nathaniel said. "That's why I want her to do it. You were willing to let me fuck you in the ass. I think you'll enjoy this more."
I might have protested, but he grabbed my hair, just tight enough to click that internal switch over so that I wanted to do what he wanted. He pushed himself inside me, and just having him inside me when I was so wet and so sensitive from the oral made me cry out. Nathaniel found a rhythm, pushing himself in and out, sliding over that one spot inside as if he could feel exactly where it was. He used my hair to push my head down toward Micah as he slid himself in and out of me. I licked Micah and found that he was harder than he had been just seconds before. He was enjoying watching us together.