“Is this supposed to make me feel good?” he asks gruffly, staring at my br**sts. “It’s f**king torture looking at you behind a screen.”
“Remy . . .” I say.
His eyebrows draw low over his eyes. “I don’t want you on your own. Is somebody there with you?”
“Nora was here, and I think Mel is outside with her now.” I leave it at that, because right now, I don’t want to tell him anything about my parents until it has all calmed down. He was rejected by his own parents and I swear that whatever I have to do, he won’t be rejected by mine. “Don’t worry, I’m not alone,” I assure him.
He nods, raking his fingers through his hair in frustration. Then he drops his face and rubs the screen with both hands. He lifts his head and narrows his eyes. “I want to touch you. I’m about to take a bite out of this f**king screen.”
A small laugh leaves me, then I groan and cover my eyes, too. Skyping is not such a great idea. Oh god, it makes you yearn. I see him and yearn and hurt and it aches. “It hurts to see you. I want to smell you too,” I say.
He lifts a camisole of mine. “I found this in my suitcase.” He lifts it and smells it, and I gasp and can almost feel his nose at my neck, scenting me. Licking me.
“Shit, Brooke, I want to be there, take you in my arms, spread you open on your bed, and f**k you until tomorrow.”
Desire explodes in my stomach as those rough words hit me. “Oh, god, me too.”
His eyes flash as he leans forward, the muscles in his upper body rippling with the move. “I wish I were there so I could squeeze your br**sts and bite the tips and tell you how much I want you.”
My bones have disintegrated inside me. The place between my legs now burns and yearns. My voice is achy and needy, full of arousal. “I want you like I’ve never wanted anything in my life,” I breathe, my bare br**sts already puckered in the air and sensitive even to the brush of the air-conditioning.
“Do you want my c**k in you?” he asks roughly.
Exhaling a shaky breath, I curl my fingers around my br**sts merely because they’re suddenly heavy and hurting. They’re hurting so much for him. “Remy, you’re killing me.”
“No. This is killing me,” he says softly, rubbing the screen in a way that lets me imagine his thumb scraping my lips, running down my jaw, circling the hard points of my ni**les. “Tell me you want my c**k in you and then pretend your fingers are me. Drop your hands, Brooke. Show me your ni**les.”
“Remy,” I say, my heart squeezing in need as I close my hands around my br**sts.
A low, rumbling growl rips up his throat as he leans even closer. “Brooke,” he rasps, rubbing his thumb over the screen again. “When I see you I’m going to get my f**king hands all over you. I’m going to run my tongue all over your pretty body. Then I’m going to rub it for hours against your clit.”
“Oh, god, Remy . . .” My cl*t throbs between my thighs as I rock my h*ps as I think about licking his neck, his chest, the star tattoo on his navel.
“Why are you holding your br**sts in your hands? Are you pretending that it’s me?” he demands huskily. When I nod, he tells me, “Good. Then pinch them slowly, like you like it. And then go south and rub yourself for me.”
“But I want to touch you,” I say, his command sending prickles of excitement racing across my skin. “I want to run my tongue all over your chest and lick your ni**les as I stroke my hands down your biceps and rub up your quads and abs. . . .”
His eyes twinkle with mischief and he shakes his head. “No, Brooke,” he chides me. “Don’t talk sexy to me if you’re not going to do what I tell you first.”
“I’ll go south if you go south too,” I dare him, my pulse beating frantically in my throat while the heat he’s kindling inside me starts to slowly, surely, burn me.
He doesn’t hesitate and moves. My body tightens, and a cataclysm of arousal seizes me as I watch his forearm flex and his arm disappear beneath his waist. I can perfectly picture his big hand stroking over himself, and my pu**y suddenly weeps.
“Remy, I want to kiss you there,” I choke, need clogging my throat, “and then I want to eat you all up, and afterward, I want to get all sticky and feel all loved and beautiful because of you.”
His voice gentles as I watch his arm move slightly. “Brooke, whether I’m there or not, you are loved and you are beautiful.”
“Remy,” I say, going south too with my fingers because I’d promised him. When I find myself slick and tender and swollen, I inhale sharply. “I need you. Call me on the phone.”
“What do you mean, little firecracker?”
“Call me on the phone.”
We hang up in Skype and I answer my phone on the first ring, and his voice sounds closer. So close it spills into me, sexier than sex itself, deep and dark with lust, and I can hear his breath in my ear, and a passionate fluttering arises everywhere inside me.
“I need you, Remy,” I explode. “I just need all of you—your heat, your mouth, your voice, you.” I close my eyes and slide my finger over the outer folds of my sex, stroking myself like he strokes me.
“God, tell me how much you need me,” he says, and his breathing sounds faster and a little rougher.
And suddenly his voice is just so close that in my head—he’s with me, his lips near my ear, his husky timbre sending a weak quivering to my thighs, and I whisper to him, “So much it’s torture to see you, to hear your voice.”
His voice is raspy. “Baby, I need you around me, clutching the f**k out of me.”
“I’m dying to see you.”
“In three weeks we’re fighting in Seattle, and I’m coming to you. And I’m going to strip you to your skin and reacquaint my whole body with yours. Every part of it.”
“I hate that you can’t be in me,” I admit thickly, my eyes fluttering shut as my body loses itself in the sound of his voice and a flush of heat spreads throughout my skin.
He’s breathing roughly. “Doesn’t matter. When I’m there, I’ll be all over you.”
He’s taken over my mind. I’m transported to our hotel room. To him. I’m there, in my head, with him. I imagine it all, remember it all. The way his thumb tweaks my ni**les. How it rubs little circles of pleasure into my clit. How his tongue laves my areolas. Rubs against my tongue. Traces the seam of my lips. How it licks my nape. The back of my ear. The shell of my ear. Dipping into the crevice.
“Please,” I gasp as I start thrashing, clutching the phone against my ear with my shoulder as I use one hand to cup my breast, the other to rub myself.
His voice makes me imagine his face as it tightens with need and pleasure, and it only yanks me further into this whirlwind of pleasure as I hear him growl, “Brooke, I’ve got my c**k in my hand and I’m pushing it inside you, and I swear I can f**king smell you. Tell me what you’re doing. . . .”
“I’m taking you. In me. I’m biting your neck and . . . Remy, Remy . . .”
I never knew I could come like this, but the instant I hear that low, drawn-out, sexy groan he sometimes releases when he’s starting to come, I lose it. Because I’ve never seen anyone come like he does. Tremors wrack my body, and I thrash in place while I struggle to remain clutching my phone, because I refuse to miss a single breath of him, a single sound he makes.
We pant afterward, sated, but as I lie there trying to recover, an utter loneliness creeps over me, suddenly overwhelming me. I can’t cuddle my lion, or kiss his lips good night, or feel his skin hot and hard on mine. I look down at my hand, wet with my own juices, and instead of feeling connected to him, for the first time, I’m more aware than ever that we’re apart. “I miss you,” I whisper sadly.
He’s quiet for a moment, then softly, tenderly: “I want to punch things all f**king day. There’s an ache in my chest I want to rip out of me, but it’s so f**king deep, I could tear my heart out and it would still be there.”
“Remy . . .”
“This is the last time I live without you. I’m half mad already and halfway into the f**king grave. I don’t like this. Every single monster in my head tells me you’ll run and I won’t be close enough to catch you. Every instinct in me screams at me to go get you. Every bone in my body tells me you are MINE—not a part of me, but my brain understands why the hell I sent you away from me. The rest of me can’t take it. You can’t convince the rest of me being away from you is right.”
“Remington Tate, I swear to you—I swear—that when I’m able to get up from this stupid bed and run again, you’re always, always, going to be the one thing I’ll run straight to.”
ELEVEN
SISTERS AND FRIENDS
Those first few nights when I first slept with Remy, I used to lie and cuddle at his side, not knowing what he was doing on his iPad. Until one day I shook aside my sleepiness and decided to investigate.
“What are you doing?” I said then, straightening up to take a peek.
He sets the Apple aside and drags me onto his lap, then he adjusts me between his thighs and grabs back his iPad, whispering in my ear as he shows me the screen, “Kicking the computer’s ass.”