“I’m heading out myself. As I said, long day.”
When he opened the door, Julian stopped pacing outside, hurried to him.
“Joel. Sorry, Nadine, I need to talk to Joel.”
“No problem. Julian.” Struck, she lifted a hand to his cheek. “You look so tired.”
“Everything feels off. I can’t work like this. I can’t handle all this. Joel—”
“Come on into my office. We’ll sit down, talk this out. Good night, Nadine.” As he turned, he sent her a long, sorrowful look over his shoulder.
“What the hell was that?” she muttered when Joel closed the office door. “What the hell?”
Inside, Julian began to pace again.
“Sit down, for Christ’s sake, Julian. You’re wearing me out.”
“I can’t sit. I can’t work. I can’t think or sleep. I’m one tangled nerve, Joel. Did you see Dallas, hear what she said? She’s going to make an arrest. What am I going to do? I should go talk to her, go talk to her and explain—”
“You’ll do no such thing. Pull yourself together! I told you I’d take care of things, didn’t I? It was an accident, and there’s no reason for you to pay any price for an accident. Will it bring her back?”
“No, but—”
“Do you want to risk going to prison, Julian?”
“No, God, no, but—”
“And ending your career, giving up everything you have, can have? For what?”
“I don’t know!” Julian pushed at his hair, clamped his hands on his temples as he paced and prowled. “It’s all so confusing. It keeps playing back in my head, but it doesn’t make sense.”
“You were drunk, Julian. You can’t be expected to remember clearly. Drunk, then in shock. My boy,” Steinburger said with such sympathy that Julian stopped, let out a long breath. “Listen now. It’s not your fault. You said you’d do as I said. You said you’d trust me.”
“I do. I do trust you. I don’t know what I’d do without your help, your support.”
“Then do what I tell you. Go back to your hotel. Pour yourself a glass or two of that very nice wine we had a bit of last night.”
“You said not to drink anymore.”
“That was last night.” Joel gave Julian a bracing pat on the back. “You’re not on the call sheet tomorrow. Indulge yourself. A nice glass of wine, while relaxing in your whirlpool. I know this has been a terrible strain on you. Put all this out of your mind for a while.”
“It’s all so mixed up, Joel.”
“I know. Follow my advice. Wine and whirlpool.”
“Wine and whirlpool,” Julian sighed, then repeated it with a nod when Steinburger stared at him. “Yes, I will. Wine and whirlpool.”
“You’ll see. It’s exactly the right solution. Tomorrow, everything will be fine. Just fine again.”
“It doesn’t feel like it ever can be.” Grief, guilt, sorrow swam in Julian’s eyes. “Joel, I’ve never hurt anyone before. I’ve never—”
“She hurt herself,” Steinburger said flatly. “You remember that. Tell you what. I’ll give you a lift. My driver’s ready for me. I’ll drop you at your hotel.”
“Okay. Maybe you could come up for a while. I hate being alone.”
“Best thing for you—we agreed, didn’t we? You follow Doctor Joel’s prescription tonight. Tomorrow, we’ll have dinner, and we’ll talk it all through. If you’re not feeling yourself again, we’ll talk about alternatives.”
“All right. Yes. Alternatives. Thanks, Joel.”