And oh, how very dull that sounded.
She had some major changes to make. And first on her list was looking for a new job or possibly setting up her own practice. Someplace where she could feel useful and make a difference. She didn’t quite know where that was, but she knew for sure it wasn’t in her drab brown downtown office. Surely, somewhere closer to home, someone had need of a savvy corporate attorney.
She stood up and put the strap of her carry-on luggage over her shoulder, careful not to spill what was left of her coffee. She had her boarding pass in hand and was making her way to the security line when she heard it.
“Molly!”
She shook her head. She was just imagining things, her mind creating fanciful illusions. Leaving Jason last night had been the hardest thing she’d ever done…even harder than it had been six years ago. She could have gone through the metal detector sooner, into the secure area, but had stayed in the cafeteria simply because somewhere deep inside, a small part of her had hoped he’d come. This was simply her longing for him manifesting itself and she disregarded it.
“Molly!”
There was no mistaking it this time. Turning completely around, she saw Jason jogging down the hall toward her, his jaw set determinedly. Don’t give in, she chanted to herself. Just because he’s here doesn’t mean he’s right.
He stopped in front of her and she looked up, struggling to keep her face neutral while the rest of her traitorous body rejoiced at seeing him. His cheeks were ruddy from cold and hurrying, his hair disheveled as if he’d run his fingers through it a million times. To Molly, knowing it was the last time she’d see a long time, he’d never looked more alluring.
“What are you doing here, Jason? We said our goodbyes last night.”
He stopped her progress in line with a hand on her arm. “You said goodbye. I didn’t.”
She looked around—several passengers were watching curiously, hearing every word. “They’ve just called boarding. We were delayed. I have to go.”
“Just…wait.” He tugged on her arm, pulling her out of line and she followed simply so the rest of the people couldn’t hear what he was saying.
She searched for the words to say what she knew had to be said. “I’ve got to go, Jason. I tried to make you see that last night.” Steady, she reminded herself.
“I know you did and you were right. Now it’s my turn to have my say.”
“I was right?”
He let go of her arm and to her surprise, la
ughed. “I know, I didn’t think I could admit it either.” He smoothed a hand over her cheek. “Yes, Molly, you were right. About everything.
“You were right about what happened six years ago. I did have this whole picture of our lives together, and I couldn’t see that it wasn’t what you wanted. When you left, I was convinced that you’d left me. But you didn’t, did you?”
“No,” she murmured. “I ran from your plan, but not from you. I loved you.”
He paused, letting that confession swirl around them both, the importance of that beautiful truth finally sinking in as she finally said the words.
“I couldn’t see that. All I could see was my dream of a home and family with you wasn’t what you wanted, and I wasn’t willing to compromise. I’ve never gotten over you, don’t you see? Then you came back and I wanted to hate you. I could see how lonely my life had become and I wanted to blame you. It worked for a while, too. Until that day we went sledding.” He reached down and took her hands in his. “I was scared, and then I was angry, and then I realized I’d never stopped loving you. I didn’t know what to do with that.”
“There’s nothing to do with that. You still want me to fall in line with some master plan of yours and I just can’t.” Even though she had talked to Kim, she couldn’t resist saying, “Kim is so much more what you want out of life.”
“How could she be what I want when I’m not in love with her?”
That stopped her, and she swallowed. Now she’d heard it from both sides.
“I can’t,” she finally managed to say. “It would end up hurting us both far more than if we walk away friends now. Please,” she implored him. “Let me do that. Let me walk away as your friend.” And let me come back and be friends.
“I can’t do that. Not after loving you last night. Not after remembering everything.”
She pulled her hands away from his and adjusted her carry on. “I’ve got to go.”
The female voice came over the intercom and announced final boarding for the flight. Molly took the first steps away from him. Her heart was heavy as she realized she was walking away from him, from them, honest and truly for good. Even when she knew she was doing the right thing, it felt very wrong.
“Don’t get on that plane,” he said loudly, causing heads to turn in his direction. When Molly spun tears were in her eyes, her lips pursed up in frustration.
“Why are you doing this to me?” she hissed, her eyes shooting daggers at him. “Just let me go!”