“Please?”
What could he give her? Running through his mind in search of any tidbit he might share, Blake couldn’t find a thing.
“I…can’t, Annie. I just can’t.”
She didn’t press him. With a small, stiff nod, she let him off the hook.
“Thank you.”
Her head turned toward him. “For what?”
“Understanding.”
She smiled then, something more than mere politeness. “I care, Blake, and I always want to understand. Don’t you get that, yet?”
He couldn’t let himself “get it.” The temptation to take the precious gift she was offering would be too great. And that would be the greatest travesty of all.
Annie’s need for love and his disorder. A match made in hell.
ON MONDAY, Cole called Blake to tell him that the sheriff had phoned with a current address and phone number for Jake Chandler. Wade Barstow had known someone, who knew someone, and they were able to speed up the process of tracing him through a cell phone bill.
“How did he take the call?” Blake asked his friend, really wanting to know how Cole had handled the conversation. Whether he’d ever openly acknowledge it or not, Cole had been greatly hurt by his friend’s disappearance.“He hasn’t taken it yet.” Cole sounded frustrated. “His voice mail says he’s out of the country for a few days. He’s due back at the end of the week.”
“Did you leave a message?”
“No, I didn’t figure this was the kind of thing you left on a machine.”
“You didn’t even ask him to call you?”
“Nope.” Cole’s defenses were definitely in high gear, leaving Blake to wonder why he’d asked to make this particular call. The local police would have been happy to pass along the job to the police department in the town where Jake Chandler lived. “Didn’t want to give him a chance to ignore the message,” Cole finally admitted.
At which time, Blake decided that maybe he didn’t like Jake Chandler all that much.
ANNIE WAS UP EARLY Tuesday morning. Much earlier than usual. She’d been awake, on and off, since the middle of the night—and she was restless about what was to come.
Early morning was the best time to test. And today was the day.At six, while it was still dark outside, and when she normally would have been sound asleep, she slid out of her narrow bed, intending to head straight to the bathroom, get the deed done and crawl back under her blankets.
Hopefully to sleep. For hours and hours. Forever, if that’s what it took to escape the pain of loving Blake. Worrying about him. Understanding that too much stood between them for them to make each other happy.
On her way to the bathroom, she stopped off at the living-room window, stood gazing out into the deserted street, looking up and down for any homes that might have lights on. Weren’t there kids who needed to be ready for school? Lunches to make? Men who had the long drive into San Antonio to work? Surely someone besides her was up and about.
Surely they were, just not within view of Annie’s front window.
But wait, was that movement out there? Certain she’d seen something, she leaned closer to the glass, studying the darkness, trying to focus just beyond where she’d noticed the motion, hoping to bring it more clearly into view.
Minutes later, when nothing further appeared, she relaxed. She’d best get the test kit out before she called the cops over trees rustling in the wind. Get back to being herself.
As if she’d ever be herself again, should that little strip of paper change color.
With a hand on her stomach, which had been finding its way there a lot lately, Annie stared out into the street, trying to imagine how she was going to feel if she knew that she was pregnant with Blake’s baby.
And how she would feel if she wasn’t.
Either way, there were things to fear. And reasons to rejoice. If she wasn’t pregnant, she’d have a reason to get Blake to sleep with her again—another shot at convincing him to stay with her.
And if she was, if she had his baby inside her already, growing, a product of her and Blake, of a love they shared, even if they couldn’t embrace it fully in their lives, then she would be complete in a way she hadn’t been for far too long.
Only then could she let go of her grief over the past, and move on to the future.