“The one we talked about the other night.”
He frowned. “Listen, Tabitha, we don’t have to let that get in the way. I’m sorry I was...distant the past couple of days, but I’m over it. I’m here for you. I’ve always been here. And I’m not going anywhere. I swear to you.”
“I was hoping you’d go to bed with me tonight.”
Wow. The power of those words almost knocked her off her seat. Way more out there than they’d seemed in the shower.
He wasn’t saying a word. Just tapping his finger against the stem of his wineglass. She’d thought he’d be taking her hand, leading her to his room. Or hers. Even the couch would be better than sitting there across from him.
Then he smiled. A weird kind of smile. One she’d never seen on him before. And yet...still all Johnny. “I appreciate the offer.” His tone was kind. Congenial. “And you have to realize I’m tempted. But...no.”
Cold now, she wished she hadn’t turned down the heat. Nowhere in her imaginings of this moment had she seen a rejection coming. “Why not?”
She wasn’t sure she wanted to know. But she didn’t know how to extricate herself, either.
“You had sex with Ma
rk out of grief over the loss of a patient.”
She’d forgotten he knew that. But...yeah. “I don’t get your point.”
“Sex is for enjoyment between two people who want it equally.”
“You want it with me. You made that pretty obvious.”
“I’m not denying that.”
“And I want it.”
“I don’t think you do.”
If she wasn’t feeling so...strange, she might start to feel angry, instead. “You think I don’t know what I want?”
“I think you’re the sweetest woman I’ve ever met, the most nurturing, and you’re trying to be a good friend to me because I’m helping you through a tough time.”
She took a minute to consider what he’d said. Was that what she was doing?
“No, that’s not it.” She shook her head.
“You’re going to tell me and expect me to believe that you’ve developed a sudden passion for my body during the past two days?”
Maybe. His kiss a few nights ago had changed her. “I’ve never felt...huge passion in that area...”
He stopped tapping on his glass. He studied her intently, then lifted his wine to take a long sip.
“I’ve been too busy taking care of myself, watching out for all the roadblocks because I knew there wasn’t anyone who’d be there to pick me up if I fell...” She didn’t want him to think she was undersexed.
Even if she was.
“You’ve never been so racked with passion that you just couldn’t say no? Couldn’t stop?”
“No.”
“Then why have sex?”
“When I was younger...because it was kind of expected, I guess.” Even to her, the reasoning sounded lame.
“And later?”