"So what about poor Nathan? Are you going to give the guy a break? Hes making himself crazy over you. "
"I havent decided his fate yet," Julie said thoughtfully. "I dont want to let him off lightly. I may not be pissed, but he went to some serious lengths to pull this over on me. "
"I dont like that look," Serena said slowly. "Youre usually plotting evil when you get that look. "
Julie gave her best innocent smile. "Who, me?"
"Sooo, tell me the answer to the million-dollar question. "
Julie arched a brow. "Which one is that?"
"How are Faiths leftovers in bed?"
Julies mouth dropped open. "You bitch. You had to go there, didnt you?"
Serena snickered, her eyes bubbling with mischief. "Youre the one who said youd never sleep with a friend s leftovers. "
"In answer to your question, he was damn good. Not as good as Nathan, but still good. At least Faith has never slept with Nathan!"
"Now that you have a threesome out of your system, how was it? All you thought it would be?"
"Who the hell says its out of my system?"
Serena snorted. "Knowing you, its not. "
"It was . . . exciting. Decadent. Had that edgy, forbidden feel to it. "
"But?"
"No but. "
"I could swear I heard a but in there. "
Julie smiled gently. How could she tell Serena the but was seeing her and Damon? That before she witnessed the absolute beauty of their love she would have said the nights with Nathan and Micah had been the best of her life?
"Maybe I just want more these days than some hot, sweaty sex and mindless bumping and grinding. "
Serena looked at her, mouth open. "But thats precisely what you said you wanted. No messy emotion. No expectations. "
"I know. Stupid of me, isnt it?"
"Its not stupid, Julie. It just seemed to have come from left field. "
"Put it this way. I saw something pretty damn special, and it made me realize what I was missing. Now, I havent decided if I want it yet. Im holding out hope that if I give myself enough time to come to my senses that Ill smack myself on the head and stay the course. "
"I wish Faith was here. Shed help me pry information out of those clamlike lips of yours. "
Julie smiled. "It was sweet of you to come over this morning. Im sorry I worried you, but you know Im glad to see you. "
"You had Damon worried too. He struggled over the ethics of allowing Nathan to participate in your fantasy. Micah might be his friend, but hes very protective of the women who come to The House. "
"Damon is a great guy," Julie said casually. "When are you going to put him out of his misery?"
A peculiar look crossed Serenas face.
"What?" Julie asked, latching onto that look. "What was that look? You arent taking a page out of Faiths book and dumping the man, are you? Dont make me hurt you. "
Serena flopped back on the couch and stared up at the ceiling. "If I tell you this youre going to think Im the biggest moron on the face of the planet. "
"Im afraid that particular title is mine," Julie said. "So spill. "
Serena sighed. "Ive been so preoccupied with worrying over whether this whole thing with Damon would last. What if I wouldnt want the type of relationship he wants long term? What if we got to that point and he couldnt accept that I no longer wanted it? What if, what if, what if until Ive driven myself crazy with all the what-ifs. "
"Recognizing your illness is the first step in your recovery," Julie said sagely.
Serena laughed. "Oh stop, Julie. Im being serious here. "
"Continue on," Julie said with a wave of her hand.
"When he asked me to marry him, all I could think was that in his position of power, how could he ever know why I accepted? Every time hes asked me, the power is weighted toward him. I dont know but it made me uncomfortable. I want. . . I want our marriage to start out on equal terms even if during the course of it I cede control and power to him. "
"You want it to be your choice. "
"Exactly! I dont want him to ever look back and doubt that I came to him freely, doubt that I gave myself entirely to him because it was what I wanted. I dont want him to think I was under some spell and would have agreed blindly if he asked me to jump off a bridge. "
Julie snickered.
"Oh shut up," Serena grumbled. "I know it sounds ridiculous. Maybe some of what inspired Faiths ninniness rubbed off on me. "
"There does seem to be a lot of that going around," Julie said wryly. "I wasnt immune to it, unfortunately. "
Serena gave her a quick hug. "Well, we can all be stupid twit females together. "
"Youll only be a stupid twit if you keep refusing Damons proposals. "
Serena pulled away and smiled one of her sexy, secretive smiles that probably drove men insane with lust. "Actually, I plan to ask him to marry me. Today. I figure he cant ever think that he coerced me if I do the asking. "
"Oooh, sneaky, devious. I love it! Id pay real money to be a fly on the wall when you ask him. "
"Yeah, Im pretty fond of the idea myself. "
"So? What are you doing over here? Get your ass back to your man and propose. "
Serena smiled and squeezed Julies hands again. "Because youre my friend and seeing you was more important this morning. I had to make sure you were okay. "
"Well, thanks. Im fine. Really. Nothing a day of pampering myself wont fix. "
"Want to do lunch this week when Faith gets back?"
"The hell with lunch. When she gets back we need to have a girls night out. Lots to celebrate. Her marriage, your engagement. "
"Okay, done. Faith is supposed to roll in Tuesday morning. Or at least thats when Damons jet is supposed to land. Knowing those two, its entirely possible theyd miss their own flight. "
"Go, go," Julie said, making shooing motions with her hands. "Go propose to that man of yours. Im so excited I cant stand it. Call me tomorrow and let me know how it went. "