No, she couldnt think that way. If she was pregnant, it would only be a temporary restraint on their part. But then she began to imagine sleepless nights, never being alone. No more kneeling in the living room as he fucked her mouth. No more lying over the arm of the couch while he fucked her long and hard.
With a groan, she buried her face in his neck, quivering with nervousness.
"Baby. "
The single endearment stroked over her ears, soothing and quieting her worries. She was being selfish. Children meant change, and if she was pregnant, she certainly couldnt escape the inevitable.
She raised her head, disgusted by the sheen of tears hanging in her vision.
"I think its been five minutes," he said softly.
She started to look over but he caught her chin, forcing her gaze back to him.
"I love you. "
"I love you too," she whispered. "Think we should look now?"
He reached over without looking and snagged the test. His hand covered the result window as he pulled it between them.
"You look," she said.
Slowly, he opened his hand, staring down at the test lying on his palm. When he frowned, her heart dropped.
"What does it say?"
"Youre not pregnant," he said softly.
Her eyes widened. Simultaneously relief and, oddly enough, disappointment swamped her. Why was she disappointed?
"Thats a good thing, right?" she asked cautiously, still unsure of his reaction. He didnt seem happy.
He stared back down at the test. "Yeah, its a good thing. Were not ready. Youre not ready, honey, and I dont want you to have a baby until were both sure its what we want. "
"I hear a but in there," she said gently.
He pressed his lips together in a rueful expression. "Would you believe that just for a teeny, tiny moment I was imagining what our baby would look like? Whether it would be a girl who was as gorgeous as her mama, or a boy who was as ornery as his father?"
Her heart ached just a bit too so she knew exactly what he meant. For a little bit shed actually allowed herself to indulge in the fantasy of what a child would mean. And even though she knew without a doubt theyd escaped a kink in their relationship they didnt need, a part of her was disappointed.
"What it means is that you and I will make wonderful parents when the time comes," she said with a smile.
He cupped her chin and kissed her again. "Well make a great mom and dad. In five years or so. "
She laughed. "Exactly! Now, you and I have a date to go celebrate not being pregnant. "
"You know," he said thoughtfully. "I have an even better idea. "
"Oh?"
"Lets get married. Tonight. "
She gaped at him. "But we cant get married tonight!"
He gave her a sly grin. "We can in Vegas. "
A sharp tingle of excitement ran circles around her belly and then climbed up her throat.
"We could call Damon, who has already offered us the use of his jet. We go to Vegas, get married, spend a few days having really great sex and then we come home and move into our dream house. "
"Oh, Gray," she breathed. "You really know how to present an argument, dont you?"
"I sure as hell hope so. Is it working?"
She gripped his hands in hers, the test still trapped against his palm.
"I should ask you if you still want to marry me. "
"Of course I do. Oh gosh, do you really think we could do such a crazy thing? What about our jobs? Im not sure Pop could spare us both. And what if Damon cant loan us the jet on such short notice?"
"Then we go book a commercial flight. If all else fails, we get in the truck and we drive. Come on, Faith. Lets get crazy and do it. Im tired of waiting. I want you as my wife. "
"Let me call Pop," she said breathlessly. "If he can spare us then yeah, lets do it. "
"Tell you what. You call Damon. Ill call Pop. Ill need to smooth his feathers for upsetting his daughter anyway. "
She kissed him exuberantly, letting all her excitement and passion bleed into that one kiss.
"Last one packed is a rotten egg!"
"Hi, Julie. I know youre out with Nathan and didnt want to bug you on your cell, so I thought Id leave a message here. Im not pregnant. God, am I relieved. Gray and I are both relieved. I mean, the test said I wasnt. "
There was a long pause, and Julie could positively see Faith grappling with the sudden realization that tests werent completely infallible. She grinned and shook her head.
"These tests are reliable, arent they? Oh shit. Okay, well, I wont think about that right now. Anyway, I wanted to call to tell you that Gray and I are getting married. Tonight, I mean. Were flying to Vegas to tie the knot and wont be back for several days. Try not to kill Nathan while Im gone. Give the man a break. Hes obviously crazy about you. You and Serena try not to have too much fun without me. Well catch up when I get back. And hey, thanks for the shoulder today. Youre the best. "
She made noisy smooching noises and then hung up.
Julie erased the voice mail and put the phone back on the kitchen table. The girl was certifiable. Shed called the wedding off, had a pregnancy scare and had eloped to Vegas all in twenty-four hours. And she had the nerve to call herself boring?
Clearly Julie needed to be taking lessons from her.
It was late, and Julie was tired, but she knew without a doubt she wouldnt go to sleep very easily. Too much occupied her mind, Nathan Tucker being the main distraction.
Hed surprised her tonight. Hed seemed alternately comfortable and ill at ease with her, almost as if she made him nervous. Was that why hed never made a move before? His shyness was actually pretty endearing.
She had no idea where things were going with Nathan. Hed dropped her off without so much as a kiss good-bye. The tension between them had been palpable, but he must have the restraint of a saint because all hed done is look at her with those gorgeous green eyes fringed with those too-long lashes. Shed melted into a puddle, and hed simply told her good night.
Shed been plotting to jump him and drag him into her apartment while he could have been talking about the weather as calmly as hed handled their farewell.
Maybe he just wasnt interested in her that way. But why go to the trouble of asking her out? Would she ever figure this guy out? He hadnt asked her out again. He hadnt given her the Ill call you line. He hadnt even said See you. Had the date gone that bad?
With an indelicate flop, she landed on the couch. Reclining, she put her head on the back and closed her eyes. Sexual frustration sucked. Men sucked.
Chapter 14
Micah leaned back in the chair in front of Faiths desk and turned his head as if to make sure they were still alone. "We still on for round two?"
"I wish to hell you wouldnt put it like that," Nathan grumbled. "And yeah, it would seem so. I mean, she asked for two nights. I guess I ought to be grateful she didnt ask for a week or something. "
Not that he’d mind a month. Hell, hed like a lot longer, but he wanted the blindfolds off and he wanted her to see him, to know it was him, to want him as much as he wanted her.
Micah eyed him with what could only be deemed amusement. "So how did the date go?"
Nathan grunted as he poured a cup of shit coffee that Micah had brewed and sipped cautiously. "It went. "
"That good, huh?"
"It went exactly how I wanted" Nathan defended.
"So, what happened? Youre acting like a bear with a sore paw this morning. ”
"Its called frustration," he growled.
Micah chuckled. "You not have a good time, or she still holding out and running circles around you? I knew I loved this girl. "
"We had a great time," Nathan said tightly. "She was great. Perfect, actually. I was determined to play it straight. She seemed convinced I was going to jump her, and I was determined to prove to her that I wasnt just after sex. "
Micah leaned for
ward. "You arent? Do tell. This gets more interesting by the minute. "
Nathan sighed and ran a hand over his smoothly shaven head. "You ever look at a woman and just like what you see? Im not talking about sex. Im talking about liking her. The entire package. "