I’m silent as she looks at me for another second.
“I’ll be with Marketing if you need me,” she says by way of goodbye.
I stand there for a long minute as Cheryl leaves.
I mean, just answer me one fucking question, if you will, and don’t skip to the end, okay?
Since when did porn get to become so fucking complicated?
152
Brittney
Two weeks left to go until the go-live for Ethan’s prototype that will revolutionize pornography for the human race.
Yeah, sounds a bit over the top, doesn’t it, hun?
In fact, this entire situation seems like something you only find in a movie or the mind of a very mischievous romance novelist.
I mean, look at me? A porn star?
Sure, I used to be famous, if famous is the word. I mean, I used to be on DVD covers and on the Internet. My face used to be plastered on porn sites. Click on me and you’d see me sucking cock. Licking another girl’s pussy. Having a cock pounded into me.
Yeah, I like sex. I liked the role playing I used to do. Pretending to be the stepmom and getting paid for it. Dressing up as the stepdaughter and moaning ‘Daddy’ and calling that work. Driving my Mercedes. Having fancy clothes. Jewelry.
I liked sex. I still like sex.
And now, I have 24 hours. 24 hours to steal the one device that could make me a star again. 24 hours to take from the man I love his greatest accomplishment and give it to his sworn enemy.
Or else, the dark shadow from my past comes back to haunt me.
Right, I keep hinting at Robert, the ex-boyfriend, but you actually have no idea completely what I’m talking about yet, do you?
I know I kept telling you that I’d fill you in but I never have.
I’m sorry about that, hun. I really want to, because you deserve to know, since you’re the reader and all.
It’s just that it’s been so difficult to bring him up. I mean, I want to completely put that part of my life in a box and forget about it.
But, I guess if I can’t tell you, who can I tell?
Well, yeah I know, don’t roll your eyes. I could probably tell Ethan too.
I probably will need to, come to think about it. Because one way or another, I think I’m fucked.
So, let’s see …
What Simon is threatening to do to me is basically tell Robert McIntyre, my ex-boyfriend, who lives in Los Angeles, California where I’m currently at.
Robert McIntyre was the man I dated when I did porn back in the day. He was the ‘modeling agent’ who found me when I was working in an elementary school. He gave me his card and wined and dined me. He fucked me first and then slowly got me used to the idea of
porn. First he had me do modeling shots that were sexier and racier. It started with bikinis and underwear. You know, the kind of stuff on Macy’s ads that you see in the newspaper.
Then it became a bit edgier. Topless shoots. Showing my tits.
Then he began getting money for those selling them to magazines. Soon, it was with a guy. And then we were both naked in the pictures. And then soon, we were fucking.
I saw the fancy cars, the clothes, the expensive watches, and the glamor and I fell for it.