7
Ryan
Ryan Age 10 : Nova Age 4
Picking up the consent form from my desk, I went into Mom’s room. I’d forgotten to have her sign it the night before when I’d gotten home from practice. She’d already been in bed and Dad said she wasn’t feeling well, so I hadn’t wanted to bother her. He’d been on his way out the door for a business trip to Chicago, so I hadn’t wanted to make him late by telling him what the consent form was about. It was just for a field trip to some museum in the city, and I wasn’t even sure I really wanted to go. I’d been there a few times already with my cousins, and it had been boring.
Knocking on my parents’ bedroom door that was slightly ajar, I waited for Mom to say I could come in. But instead, I heard the sound of someone throwing up and groaning like they were in pain. Dropping the piece of paper, I took off running in the direction of the sound. The light in the bedroom was off, but the one in the bathroom was bright and glaring down on Mom as she sat on her knees in front of the toilet, vomiting repeatedly.
Thinking quickly, I found a washcloth and dampened it with cold water. Once I’d wrung out the extra water, I placed it on the back of her neck like she did for me when I was sick, and I started rubbing her back. It took a few minutes before she was able to stop dry heaving, and then she dropped back, wiping at her sweaty brow.
“What should I do?” I asked her, wondering if I should call Dad or run and get Zia Scarlett.
Taking the washcloth from her neck, she wiped her face with it and gave me a weak smile. “Nothing, l’venok. I’m fine.”
“But you were throwing up,” I argued. “You’re sick. You need to see a doctor.”
“I have,” she assured me in a tired voice. “Everything is fine, I promise.”
“But…”
She tossed the washcloth aside and grabbed my hand in one of hers while her other hand went to her stomach. “We were going to wait to tell you, but I don’t want you to worry. Ryan, I…” She paused, and my stomach tightened into a painful knot.
Please don’t say something bad. Please don’t let her have something that will take her away from me.
There were two people in the world I couldn’t live without, and she was one of them. If I lost either Mom or Nova, I didn’t know what I would do. For the most part, I’d been forced to live without Nova except for our video calls. For my birthday this past summer, Mom and I had flown to California to visit with Nova and her family for a few days. But it hadn’t been nearly enough time for me.
We were supposed to go back this coming weekend for Nova’s fifth birthday. I’d been trying not to think about it because I didn’t want my excitement at seeing my favorite person in the universe to annoy everyone, but the truth was I’d been counting down the minutes until I could hug Nova again.
But if Mom was sick…
“I’m pregnant,” Mom announced, her smile a little shaky. “You’re going to be a big brother.”
“What?” I yelped in a mixture of happiness and nervousness. “You’re going to have a baby?” Mom nodded, her smile growing more and more wobbly by the second. “But you’re so sick.”
Her hand tightened around mine. “It happens. Morning sickness is exhausting, but it won’t last long. As soon as this passes, I’ll be good as new.”
I nodded, pretending to understand, but it didn’t really help my anxiety over something happening to her. Was being pregnant dangerous? I vaguely remembered Zia Scarlett being pregnant with Vito and Bennie, but I’d been so young back then that it was barely a memory at all. She’d been okay, though, at least while pregnant. Afterward, when she’d donated one of her kidneys to Zia Victoria, that was when she’d become so sick we’d all worried about if she would ever get better.
Mom’s smile dropped, and she turned to vomit again.
I stayed with her until she was done, then helped her stand and wash out her mouth before making her lean on me as we walked back into her bedroom. Being as careful as possible, I tucked her into bed. “You rest. Don’t worry about anything.”
“Ryan…” She paused. “I’m sorry, but it doesn’t look like we will be able to go to Creswell Springs this weekend. I promise, as soon as this all clears up, we will go. Maybe for Christmas.”
I nodded, understanding even though my heart felt as if it were on fire with disappointment. Mom’s health was more important than my own wants or needs. I didn’t want her to suffer through a long flight if she was sick just to make myself happy. Especially when I knew it was going to hurt even worse when I had to leave Nova behind.
“It’s all right, Mom. We can go another time.” I kissed her cheek and turned off her light before backing away. “Do you need anything? I’ll get it before I go to school. Or if you need me to stay home, I can. With Dad in Chicago, one of us should be with you.”
“No, no, you go to school. I’ll be fine in a few hours.” Her eyes scanned my face lovingly. “Thank you for understanding, l’venok. I’m so sorry.”
I shook my head. “You have nothing to be sorry for. You can’t help that you’re sick. I love you, Mom. You being okay is more important.”
Outside her room, I picked up the consent form and crushed it into a ball. As I entered my bedroom, I tossed it into the wastebasket and grabbed my phone and backpack. It was too early to call Nova and let her know I couldn’t make it for her birthday, but I knew I had to tell her.
Downstairs, Ciana was waiting with Vito and Bennie. Zayne and Zariah had already left since they were in middle school, and that was in the opposite direction of ours. Vito and Bennie were in kindergarten, which had its own private wing and entrance, but the four of us always rode together every morning.
Zio Ciro hustled us outside and into the back of the limo, where two guards were already waiting with the door open. While the twins argued and played tug-of-war with the strap of Bennie’s backpack, Zio scrolled through his emails. I sat against the door, frowning out at the passing scenery, wondering what I could tell Nova that would keep her from being upset that we wouldn’t see each other as I’d promised.