I’ve been dreaming and dreaming, knowing that I’d already let her go, and that I could never get her back. Knowing that every single dream I weaved would be broken, would be unfulfilled.
But it was okay.
I only cared about her.
The girl who sees me like no one else has.
And for whom I spent the afternoon, holed up in a jail cell.
Which is where I’m coming out of right now.
I thought everything was fine though. That I’d taken care of everything last night.
But apparently not.
As soon as I dropped Bronwyn off at St. Mary’s, I called Principal Carlisle.
I told her what happened and what Helen saw. And then I told her the truth. I told her what had been going on for the past few months. What my intentions were moving forward.
And so I was quitting.
I couldn’t stay in a position that could jeopardize my goals, Bronwyn’s reputation. Even for the next four weeks.
I also told her that I would submit to an investigation if need be. I would cooperate and sit through whatever internal reviews she thinks might be necessary.
But my only condition was that it be kept quiet and strictly confidential. Which was in their favor as well; no one wants a student/teacher scandal especially at a reform school. And because I wanted them to keep her out of it. And if in order to do that I had to take the blame on myself or if they had to put this on my permanent record, I was okay with that.
I’m not sure why but at the end of my story, Leah — Principal Carlisle — looked extremely tired.
Maybe because it was the middle of the night or the fact that earlier that year, she’d already gone through a couple of such situations. One I’m familiar with — my own sister getting pregnant and Leah still keeping her on. And the other involving one of my sister’s friends, Salem, and her own son, Arrow.
Whatever the case may be, she said, “The news won’t come from me. But if Helen chooses to share it and involve the board, then I’m not going to stop her. This is a serious situation, Conrad, I hope you know that. There will be questions about authority and consent and code of conduct. The only reason I’m not taking any action by myself is because I know you. I’ve known your reputation for years. It’s beyond reproach and because you chose to come to me and you’re willing to quit and sit in for a formal investigation if need be. And the fact that she’s eighteen. Maybe that makes me an irresponsible adult and a teacher. But again, if others want to ask questions, I’m not going to stop them.”
So then the only thing left to do was talk to Helen.
I knew it wouldn’t be easy. To convince her to let this go. Given that again she was at my house for the very things I’ve denied her and refused to give. She’s not really good with giving up on what she wants.
So I didn’t even try.
All I said was that the truth was out in the open and that I was quitting. So if she wanted revenge, she had it. But if she wanted more, she was welcome to do whatever she wanted to me but not to her.
But I guess she didn’t listen because she still involved her.
Her father.
Who had me arrested.
So far I’ve managed to find a solution for that as well. Temporary but effective, seeing as how I’m bounding down the stairs of the police station, having just made the bail.
With the help of the last person I wanted to call.
Reed Jackson.
He stands, leaning against his white Mustang, waiting for me as I stride across the street. When I reach him, he straightens up and jerks his chin at me. “You okay?”
“Yeah,” I reply truthfully.
I am okay.
Usually by this time of the day, my shoulders start aching. My skull starts pounding and I have a tightness in my muscles that no amount of stretching or pills can take away. And these past three weeks the pain has been really bad.
Not today though.
Today I’m surprisingly okay.
“Appreciate you bailing me out,” I continue.
He shrugs. “It was nothing.” Then with a small smirk, “And I think I’ve got something for you.”
I go alert. “Fucking finally.”
He frowns at that. “These things take time, all right? He’s the fucking DA. He’s got his shit locked up tight. My guy had to dig and dig.”
“And.”
He shrugs again. “And I think we hit jackpot. He’s sending over stuff later. I’ll call you when he does.”
Three weeks ago, at her dad’s party I made a promise to her.
I promised that I’d set her free.
Even though she’d finally taken a stand, I had a feeling that her father wouldn’t let her go so easily. So I knew that I had to do something. I had to permanently eliminate his threat.