He shrugged, then remembered she couldn’t see him any more than he could see her. It was crazy how truly dark everything was. Forget the bedside lamp he usually left on twenty-four seven, with the power out and the storm blocking any moonlight, not even a ghost of a glimmer shone through the windows. No power indicator lights blinked from any appliances to soften the inky blackness.
And then he realized a second later, even crazier still was how his back and forth kinda bickering with Raine shifted the focus from the black hole of his fear—even when they were beating around the bush about that exact subject.
“I want to be here with you, Reyes. We don’t even have to—whoops—that’s the bed.” Her voice sounded a bit breathless. She pulled harder on his hands for a moment, and his body collided with hers. “We can just lay here if you don’t want to talk.”
A great offer, but if he lay with her without talking, he’d end up thinking of all the things he wanted to do with her.
Talking might be safer.
He disengaged their hands and stepped back, but didn’t go any farther.
“Or…” she ventured, “you could tell me about what happened to you three years ago.”
He’d rather think about all the things he wanted to do with her.
Rustling noises told him she was doing something, but he couldn’t even see the shadows of her movement. His fingers clenched for a moment before he consciously relaxed them. Even if he could manage to scrape together every last little atom of willpower he possessed, it wouldn’t get him back out to the couch, so he sidestepped around her, felt for the edge of the bed, and then sat while toeing off his shoes. Then he swung his legs up on top the comforter and scooted back against the headboard.
“I already told you what happened.”
“I know, but—” The mattress dipped as she climbed up—right over him. “Oh. Sorry. I can’t see anything.”
He sucked in a breath when her hand brushed over his groin. He quickly reached to help her over to the other side of the bed and encountered a whole palmful of warm, bare thigh.
Holy shit—had she stripped down?
Heat seared through his veins as he jerked his arm away and grabbed the top of the headboard to keep from reaching for her again.
“What did you take off?” he asked before he could help himself.
“My jeans were wet.”
Which meant she was in his bed in just his shirt. He leaned his head back against the headboard as the semi he’d been trying to will away swelled to full mast.
Yeah, he was totally fucked.
She rustled around a bit more, adjusting the pillow by the sound of it. But then she scooted in close against his left side, and he stiffened when she tucked her shoulder under his arm, draped her arm across his stomach and pillowed her head on his chest. Her knee rested against his thigh—thank God, because if she’d draped it over him, he was pretty sure nothing could’ve stopped him from reaching down to haul her fully on top of him.
Reyes stared across the room in the dark, the headboard biting into his fingers as he gripped it tight while his pulse roared in his ears. Like earlier in the barn—and any other time he got too close—the airy, floral scent of her filled his senses and had him wanting to bury his face in her hair.
Talk about torture. Laying there on his bed with her pressed against him was worse than working with her with the thoroughbreds the past couple of weeks. He’d done his level best to keep everything strictly business, but in this moment—and if he was being honest, all the others before it—he was helpless against the tide of emotion he should resist at all costs.
Raine slid her hand up his chest to his face, her touch ghosting over his lips before shifting down just a bit. His pulse stumbled when she traced the line of his scar with her fingertip.
“Did this happen that day?”
He swallowed hard at the question and managed a slight nod and strangled sound of confirmation. She didn’t press further, and after a long moment, he let out a pent up breath while lowering his arm to curve over her shoulder and arm. She snuggled closer, and his heart warmed, even as his gut tightened at the words rushing to the tip of his tongue.
But what was that stellar advice he’d given her weeks ago?
You gotta face what happened.
“It was supposed to be a routine sweep of an isolated compound. Intel said the place had been deserted for weeks.” He paused as vivid memories flashed in his head like snippets from a movie trailer. “I led the way in initially, but we spread out to check the rooms, and one of my guys hit a trip wire.”
Her palm flattened against his jaw, warm and comforting. Reaching up with his free hand, he pulled hers back down to his chest and held tight.
“I have vague memories of screams and yelling and then nothing until I woke up on the plane to Landstuhl in Germany. I couldn’t see a damn thing.”
“I can’t even imagine how terrifying that must’ve been.”