I stood near the window, gazing out at the lush forest. If I squinted hard enough, I could picture how it used to look. There would have been large groups of researchers and government officials roaming the courtyard, speaking loudly about complex issues. Back then, everyone was convinced those scientists were going to be the ones to fix the world's problems.
Kahn and I used to walk and explore the halls. They were brightly lit and immaculately clean. Now, the place looked like fucking Chernobyl.
I wasn't here to reminisce. I was here to find something important. I needed the cure to my affliction.
When my brother and I were quarantined in the premises, her mother kept our spirits high with stories. Whenever she discussed the future, there was a twinkle in her eyes. She told me I'd come back here. She said this is where I'd find the serum.
This was where we’d said goodbye. This was the place we ultimately left behind. And I was starting to get the feeling that we shouldn't have come back.
I was wrong for taking her here. Magic didn't exist. Her mother couldn't have known the future. Her mind must have been infected.
There weren't any answers here. This ghost town was just another remnant of what could not be undone.
While Lilly slept, I scoured the premises, searching nearly every single room on th
e west wing. Most of what I found was rat shit and trash. The east wing was my next target, but it was getting late.
Quickly, I ran back to our room and saw that she was awake and waiting for me. She appeared to be concerned. "Mind telling me the next time you run off?"
I bit my lip and chuckled awkwardly. I should have told her what I was searching for. There was no excuse for holding this back, but I felt ashamed.
I wasn't okay with who I was. With what happened. And no matter how many times I came to an understanding with it, I always fell back into deep resentment. If I was going to be with her, I had to give her all of me. Even the bad parts.
But every time I saw my reflection, I saw a stranger staring back at me. A freak. I saw someone who didn't deserve love. I wasn't strong like she thought I was. Maybe on the outside. But I was fucking weak on the inside. All I could do was try for her.
I stepped forward, but she inched back. "Lilly, I'm sorry," I said. "I was looking around to get an idea of what to do next."
She sighed and looked at the ground, modestly. "No, I'm sorry," she said. "I shouldn't have come at you so hard. You don't deserve that. You've been good to me."
I opened my arms and sucked in her pheromones as she embraced me. I kissed the center of her temple and cheek. "I'm not going to leave you," I said.
"I just get worried sometimes," she said. "I've been left in the dark for so long, I guess I feel like another crash is inevitable."
"Come with me," I said. "I want to show you something."
I took her hand and guided her toward the staircase to the outside courtyard. We walked past the pond in the center, cutting toward the east end of the massive structure. A thin gate that had already started to capsize from the overgrowth of plants surrounded the area.
This was where it’d happened. The remnants of the virus were still here.
We stopped before an unhinged door.
"Is this where my mother worked?" Lilly asked.
I turned and nodded. "Yes, it is."
She let go of my hand and glanced at the broken glass surrounding the entrance. "Well, let's go inside, I guess," she said.
"After you."
She walked inside the room, gliding her hand through the chipped paint. One by one, the white scales fell to the floor like snowflakes.
"It's hard to believe she was ever here," she said, pausing in thought. "Lucian, why did you bring me to this facility?"
My heart raced. Now was my chance to tell her that I had no plan, but I couldn't find the courage to do it. Instead, I hid the fact that I wanted that cure. I forced myself to keep walking in hopes that something in this room would point us in the right direction.
"I thought you might want to see it," I said, pulling her deeper into the building.
Lilly held my hand and followed me down an old stairwell. The specific laboratory my father and her mother had clearance to enter was on the second floor. I counted all twenty-four steps and opened the door to the floor. "Just a little further."