“I am not meddling.”
The bag swings and I catch it giving her the stink eye. Piper wouldn’t be so worried unless something happened and I don’t like that scenario at all.
“You are totally meddling. So either Milo isn’t keeping you busy enough at home or this guy was a complete dickbag.”
Arms crossed, toe tapping Piper eyeballs me. “I’m well aware of his dickbag status. I want you to teach her some self-defense moves.”
“Why? Did something else happen?” I scan Piper’s face. She avoids looking at me. “What happened, Piper?” I demand tossing the towel down.
She winces and I’m tempted to shake her senseless if she wasn’t harboring another human being at the moment. “He may have wanted more at the end of the date and Milo happened to be opening the front door hearing them and had to punch his co-worker.”
“Milo? Milo, your husband? The calmest guy I know?” I’m actually shocked and to be honest proud of my friend. Not that I didn’t think Milo couldn’t hold his own, but that he actually lost control enough to sucker punch a guy.
“Yes, Jax.”
“Milo the doctor?”
“YES!” Piper shouts rubbing her belly and I’m suddenly contrite. Can’t have Piper giving birth at the gym, her husband would have a conniption fit, especially if it was my fault.
“You okay, Pip?” I ask worried she might drop a kid from under her dress.
“Fine.” She growls taking a deep breath.
“Did he hurt her?”
“No, Diana is just shaken up. She’s skittish around guys, I should have known better, but I didn’t think this guy would move in for a front porch make out session with us inside babysitting.”
“Right.” I make a note to get the guy’s name from Milo next time I’m over for dinner. I hate that kind of shit. The guy should have been reading his date’s body language to know she wasn’t ready or into it.
“So you’ll do it?”
“Of course.” As if there was any other conclusion to this clusterfuck of Pip’s making. I liked Diana, as in I liked-liked her and if the universe would cooperated for two point two seconds I might even get to test that out.
“I knew you would.” Piper winks before adding, “Just keep your bear paws to yourself.”
“And what part of this isn’t meddling again?” I ponder how intimate self-defense teaching can get. We’d be forced to have some kind of physical contact. Diana on the ground and underneath me is a nice thought. Real nice.
“God no.” Piper slaps my chest. “I can already see where your mind is headed so just don’t try anything!”
“Ouch.” I rub the spot. It actually hurt because Piper put real energy behind the slap like a momma bear. I want to see if she left a mark but don’t want to give her the satisfaction when I check under my shirt.
Her tone deflates. “Totally not your type.”
Piper keeps talking but I stop listening with the assumption she’s put out there again, as if she’s somehow warning me off.
Scowling, “Unfair. Pretty sure I don’t have a type, Piper.”
I have preferences for lots of things. Ice cream, colors, cars, and sexual positions, but rarely ever for women.
“Uh huh.” She nods and I look in the mirror to see she’s referring to a woman I used to train. Big breasts, small waist, lean muscles and hair about three different shades of auburn. That woman was a client until she got handsy, now Igor trains her for bikini competitions. The other stuff I don’t ask about watching him walk over to her with a wide smile that obviously speaks to carnal knowledge of each other.
“What would be so awful if I was interested?” I test the water dipping my toe into the ocean of doubt in Pip’s expression.
She laughs. The brat actually chokes on a laugh.
“Really, Pip? I’m that far out of contention?”
“Well, come on Jax.” She perseverates, “When have I ever seen you be serious about a girl with an IQ higher than a banana? Anyway, she’s a mom and Maisy is my goddaughter.”