As promised, I dropped Kiara off at home and she commented on my stalker like abilities. It was cute and the high of being with her carried me through the rest of the day and football practice. She even waved hello at me in the hallway during classes and I considered that a huge win. When I drove the cart out to the football field and track, she hopped in and rode with me as students observed. Internally, I fist pumped the air and shouted she was all mine. We had a game this weekend and she had a cross country meet. Our athletic seasons would soon be winding down and I was eager to have her attention devoted to me.
It was the sweet to my day until I came home and opened the accounting program to find the pit my brother had been good at hiding from me until now. I had a few options which included the temptation of calling our parents to set him straight. We’d been through too much as a family to keep doing this with him.
I found Andy behind the bar helping Pedro with the rush crowd.
“I know what you do with slush fund every month. I wish you’d stop pretended and just say it, Andy.”
He was aggravating on a good day. I hated seeing him so wounded over this girl who left him the way she did. Part of me wanted to track her down and shake some sense into her, give my brother the closure he deserved. I wanted him to move on and be happy. I wanted my brother back, not the fake imposter that stood here in front of me lying about his feelings and pasting a smile on his face.
I was tired of dealing with elephants in small bars.
“What do you want me to say? That I miss her? That I love her? That she’s like this North Star I can’t stop looking up in the sky for?”
I wanted to hit something hard. I fisted my hands and tried the breathing exercise from the yoga class to calm my racing heart and the heat that rushed to my head every time I thought about her. There wasn’t much that riled me, not even Viola and her lies.
“She’s been gone a long time and you’ve been punishing yourself ever since. It’s hard to watch and harder to stomach. I’m losing my brother to something I can’t stop.”
“David.” Andy wore this defeated look which made me hate his girl even more. Since I found Kiara and a bit of happiness I couldn’t bear for him to miss out on something special. He deserved better than a damaged girl who refused to give him closure. I knew she was a sadist, but I didn’t think she’d hurt him this bad.
“I need you to say it.”
“Say what? Say that the extra money I make goes to keeping her safe?”
“I know you hired a private detective to keep tabs on her. Why not just go get her and bring her home?” It made the most sense even if it broke several laws.
“Kidnapping is a federal offence across state lines. I’m pretty sure our mother would frown on that.” He said putting his focus on wiping the spots from the baller glasses before putting them away.
“You want me to go and get her?” Because I would. I’d drag Sierra Occho back kicking and screaming if I could.
“No thanks.” He was in deep torturing himself because he couldn’t save a girl. I wasn’t sure she even was worth saving, but convincing him otherwise wasn’t happening.
“No. I mean, go to her. End it. Get some fucking closure. Get laid. Just don’t do nothing.” I knew I could plead with him until I was blue in the face, but I had to try. If our mother knew what this girl was putting Andy through her heart would be broken.
“She’s been hurt by everyone in her life. I wouldn’t be doing anything different by demanding something she can’t give me.”
I threw my hands up in the air convinced my brother had imbibed too many hops or grain alcohol to argue with him.
“She’s keeping you from finding your own slice of happiness.”
“David, when
I say that Sierra is my North Star, I mean it. She is my everything and maybe one day I’ll be ready to let go, but not today, and not tomorrow, and not anytime soon.”
I let that go, but not the private detective shit. I didn’t want some stranger doing work I could be doing for free.
“Fine.” I said laced with frustration, but determined to see this through.
“What do you mean?”
“Call off your dog. I’ll do it, and I won’t even charge you for it.”
He huffed. “David.”
“Andy.” I growled prepared to go back and forth with my brother all night long over this. We had too many sleepless nights as a family taking care of this girl. If Andy wasn’t done with her, fine, but I didn’t know how long I could support him on this fools mission. When I was serving in the military I wasn’t around to see the totality of his anguish. I wasn’t going to let my brother waste another decade of his life when he could be happy with someone else. Someone who was worthy of him.
His head hung low and he stuffed his hands in his pockets. “I think what you’ll find will only make you despise her more than necessary. This is my money, and my choice. Let it go, David. You have a girl and I have mine.”
“More than what I heard Damien and Chase talk about?” I referred to the bachelor party. Apparently what happens in Vegas becomes sewing circle gossip with the guys.