“I wonder how many people have ever felt anything like this,” I murmur, cheek pressed against the cool glass as I watch the city glide by.
After dinner, Jaxon took my hands in his and whispered in his gruff alluring voice, “I want to take you somewhere.”
My belly stirred and my womb rejoiced and my anxiety tried to take over the moment, as I wondered if he was going to take me back to his place… and then what?
The revelation that he’s also a virgin has taken some of the sting out of my attack of shyness. Sure, it’s not like I’m going to spontaneously become some nymphomaniac or anything like that. But knowing we’re in this together makes me so much more hopeful for when we finally claim each other, knowing it’s going to be his first time as much as mine.
Even if – like all of this – it makes my thoughts spin and spin with the seeming impossibility.
But no, I’m done thinking like that.
Jaxon could’ve had anyone.
And he’s chosen me.
“Jessie?” His wolfish growling voice cuts through my thoughts. “Where did you drift off to?”
“I was thinking about us,” I admit, turning to him and greedily drinking in the sight of his strong firm jaw. “But what did you say?”
“I said hell no. Nobody’s ever felt anything like this before. Me and you, we’re special. And I don’t care how corny that sounds.”
“It doesn’t sound corner,” I say quickly, and then giggle. “Okay, maybe a tiny bit. But it also sounds true.”
“That’s because it is,” he says, his confidence letting a little of my own light up within me. “What are the chances you’d feel the same, want the same life as me? And speaking of this new life…”
He casually strokes his hand up my thigh, making every inch of me quake and sizzle.
“Hmm?” I ask, struggling to repress a moan.
“How many?”
“How many what?”
He chuckles. “What do you think? Pet ducks? How many children do you want? Have you ever thought about it before?”
“No, not in years,” I tell him honestly.
That’s what we’re going to be now, always. Honest above all else. We owe that to each other, especially after he told me the truth about his virginity. I could tell how difficult that was for him, probably because it’s so much harder for men to admit, especially for a man his age.
But I don’t care. It makes me want him more.
He waited. He really freaking waited for me.
“But you used to?” he prompts.
“Yeah, when I was a little kid and my aunt first told me about my parents. Well, about the so-called car crash. I used to dream that I’d grow up and find the man of my dreams and we’d have children, four or five—”
“Bingo.” He grins over at me, before returning his attention quickly to the road. “That’s exactly what I was thinking. Four or five. But then I shouldn’t be surprised we want the same thing.”
“A house full of happy smiling faces, footsteps always running around, with something always going on.” My cheeks ache from smiling so hard. “And they’ll all look out for each other. I’m not saying there won’t be arguments, sibling rivalries, stuff like that. But when you get past all that stuff, they’ll love each other, they’ll be loyal to each other. They’ll never abandon each other.”
“Yes,” he growls. “I want that too. So badly. So why did you stop fantasizing about it?”
“I grew up,” I murmur, placing my hand atop his on my thigh.
Instinct wills me to move his touch up toward my sex, but reason tells me not to, not while he’s driving.
It might give him false ideas about just how ready I am.
I don’t think I’ll be able to handle a roadside unleashing of our lust just yet…
But one day. Yeah, one day I think we might do that.
“I went to high school and I realized there was no such thing as the man of my dreams.”
“Ouch.” He chuckles, moving his hand to change gears. “Hit me where it hurts, why don’t you.”
I giggle and slap his arm, lovingly. How easily the movement comes to me now, without any of the self-doubts which have threatened to cripple me for so long. I’m under no delusions. I’m not saying this newfound confidence will mystically make me outgoing in other aspects of my life.
But with Jaxon, I feel brand new, ready for the adventure of our lives.
“I was going to say before I met you before you so rudely interrupted me.”
We laugh together as he takes a turn, guiding us onto a long street of storefronts, all of them closed since it’s after business hours.
“Have you ever thought about trying to find him?”
“Who? My dad?”
“Yeah.”
I think for a second. “I used to dream about it as a kid. But as time wore on, I let the idea go. First of all, my aunt is more than enough for me. She’s the most wonderful woman I’ve ever known. I get it, she lied to me about my parents… but she did that to protect me, and she told me the truth in the end.”