“Piper,” I began. I had almost forgotten about her completely. “I can explain.”
“Save it,” she spat. She stormed past me. I turned and ran after her.
“Stop!” I said. “Please, just listen. You don’t understand.”
“Oh, I understand perfectly, Logan,” she yelled. She turned on me and took a step forward. Her eyes were on fire with rage and alcohol. “This is just who you are! Right when things start to get good again, you screw it up! You start throwing punches in bars! Beating the crap out of random strangers and…”
“He wasn’t random!” I screamed. “You have no idea what you’re talking about!”
“The hell he wasn’t!” she screamed back. “I can’t believe I fell for your crap again!”
“Will you just listen to me?” I begged. “Please. I can explain. I know that guy, okay? We were in the SEALS together. On the same team and…”
“So, you were fighting with someone you served with?!” Piper demanded. “What the hell is wrong with you?! What kind of person have you become?”
“I don’t know!”
I felt my entire body shake. My blood was boiling as I remembered the things McCullers said inside Kellan’s. His words hit me harder than anything ever had. He finally put into words exactly how I’d felt since the night Young died. No one knew how much that night tore me apart. Even my own team members thought I was responsible. I always thought it was my fault, but after my confrontation with McCullers, I knew I was right.
“I’m going home,” Piper announced. She looked at me with disgust and shook her head. “Don’t follow me. Don’t ever speak to me again.”
“Piper!” I called after her as she hurried down the street. I moved to follow her, but my legs weren’t strong enough to hold me. After everything that happened that night, I couldn’t stand for another second. I collapsed on the asphalt and rolled onto my back.
As I stared up at the stars, the world around me spun and my stomach heaved uncomfortably. I rolled over and vomited. When I was done, I laid my head back down and closed my eyes.
“Alexander, you look like shit, man.”
I heard Young’s voice in my head as clearly as if he was laying right beside me. The tears began to flow.
“Get up,” he said. “You’re already pathetic enough without passing out in front of a bar. Just get up.”
“I can’t,” I said out loud. “I can’t do it anymore, Young.”
“You have to,” his voice whispered.
“Why?” I asked. My voice cracked with emotion.
“Because you lived, man
,” he told me. “You lived.
Twenty- Two
Piper
I woke up the next morning with a pounding headache, but it wasn’t from the alcohol. Immediately, I remembered everything that happened the night before. Having sex with Logan in the bathroom. Feeling like I could never want anyone more than I wanted him. Then, the waves of guilt that washed over me as I remembered how our daughter had been conceived.
Logan still didn’t know that Lillianna existed. We were falling for each other all over again and I hadn’t told him the most important part of my life… I hated myself for it.
When I left the bathroom, I was ready to tell him everything. I felt bold and confident after the five drinks and the orgasm. I knew I could tell him the truth and I knew he would understand. But, when I saw him tackle that man everything changed.
I stood back and watched as he pummeled some random guy. There was blood everywhere. People tried to break them apart, but it took a few tries before they could pry Logan off him. I felt sick just watching the way Logan’s face twisted with rage and violence. The strong, muscular body I knew so well was being used for something I hated. He was hurting someone senselessly.
After everything Logan and I had been through, I didn’t think there was anything that could tear us apart again.
I was wrong.
Seeing Logan fight that way made me regret every single moment I had spent back in Bradberry. I stormed down the street and didn’t slow down until I reached my parents’ house. By the time I feel asleep that night, I had decided to leave the next morning.