I reached out for him, but he pulled away, standing to his feet with his head bowed to the floor.
“You’re a virgin,” he said.
“Why does that matter?” I asked.
“It always matters,” he said as he turned around. “That kind of thing matters.”
“Why?”
“Because your first time should be with someone special. Someone you love and care about.”
“If it was up to my father, my virginity would be sold to the highest bidder,” I said.
“No one works like that, Ava.”
“My father does,” I said.
It must’ve been the sincerity in my voice, because Travis slowly turned around to look at me. I saw the hesitancy in his eyes. The way his primal nature had curled back into his gut. I should’ve kept my mouth shut. I should’ve kept my head in the game. I felt tears of embarrassment rising to my eyes, and I curled my legs into my chest to keep them at bay.
“I’ve never gotten to make my own decisions in life,” I said. “Never. I’ve always followed the plan my father had. And if I ever bucked up to him, then I was punished. Harshly. But this is my body. It’s my virginity. And I want to choose who I give it to.”
Travis’ eyes locked onto mine as a tear dripped down my cheek.
“I don’t want my body explored by someone who’s just gonna… use it for their own pleasure. Take what’s theirs and leave. That’s what would make it special for me, Travis.”
“I don’t love you,” he said.
“Well, I don’t love you either. I’m not asking you to love me. I’m only asking you to explore me.”
His eyes raked down my body as I uncurled my legs from my chest.
“Are you sure about this?” he asked.
“More than anything I’ve ever been in awhile,” I said.
“You know we’ll have to talk about why you came back. Why you just showed up on my porch,” he said.
“And that’s fine. You deserve those answers.”
“And you deserve someone who will treat your body with the care it deserves,” he said.
His knee dipped onto the bed as I stood to my knees. He shuffled toward me, his hand rising up to cup my cheek. His thumb brushed my tear away as my eyes danced between his, then his hands dropped to the hem of my shirt.
“If you get uncomfortable, all you have to do is tell me to stop. I will in a heartbeat,” he said.
“I know,” I said. “I know you will.”
Slowly, he lifted my shirt from my body. I kneeled in front of a beautiful man with only half my clothes on. My hands pressed into his chest as his arms wrapped around me, undoing my bra in one swift movement. My breasts hung against my skin as the piece of fabric fell to the bed, then I watched Travis’ face dip to my chest.
He sucked one of my nipples between his lips as a groan peeled from my throat.
My hands worked his shirt off his head, my fingertips running over his chiseled muscles. I couldn’t stop taking him in. The breadth of his shoulders and the strength of his chest. I watched his back flex with every move he made as his beard tickled its way down my body. His lips were heated against my skin, causing me to roll my hips into him without my coaching.
Without my thinking about it.
Looking into his eyes, he slowly slid my pants away from my body. Soon, I was bare for him, my skin on fire with the sparks he ignited against my body. His hands drifted up my thighs, shivering me to my core as I laid my head back down onto the pillow.
I had an idea of what he was going to do next, and I braced for the sensations I had read about.