The phone rang until it went to voice mail.
The recording played in my ear.
You have reached the phone of Hailey Clark. I am unable to take your call right now. Please leave a message and I will get back to you as soon as I can. Beep…
I hung up without leaving a message. What was the use when the others I left had gone unanswered?
Hailey was ignoring me.
It had been two days since the hot session in the library. Two days since she left me in the building watching her walk away and not knowing what to do to stop it.
Two days since I felt like a part of me was missing.
Two days of trying to find a way to stop caring so much.
It was so much easier to be a playboy and keep my heart unattached, that was for damn sure. Being the guy I was before would make this situation so much easier to handle.
I had never cared for woman like this until Hailey. Even after we broke up, I had never connected with another woman like that and I was beginning to think that I would never again. My mind was settling into the fact that Hailey was it for me.
She obviously didn’t feel the same way about me though.
She couldn’t wait to get away from me every time we made love and damn, if her running out on me didn’t make me feel cheap and used.
The guys on my old military squad would have laughed their asses off if they heard that particular thought.
I should stop beating myself about this and let it go.
For a little while I had even convinced myself that I this was just a momentary bout of craziness I was feeling. It would go away soon. Maybe this distance was a good thing for me.
All that self-talk didn’t change the fact that I missed Hailey. Not just her body and the things it did to mine, but her smile, hearing her talk, her scent. Everything. I missed everything about her.
No matter how much I wished it, these feelings were not going to just disappear. I was forced to stop bull-shitting myself and man up and admit I was all kinds of messed up over Hailey.
If I knew where she lived, I would have gone and knocked her door down. I would have talked her ear off and forced her to listen to what I had to say.
It was probably a good thing I didn’t know her address then because I would have just looked like a damn fool.
I put the cellphone away before I dialed her number again and pulled out a text book instead. I would try to get some studying done before I headed to bed. It was Monday evening. Hailey and I had Biology labs in the morning. I would confront her then and lay my feelings on the line.
***
Saying my piece was a lot easier said than done when I was confronted with a cold and aloof Hailey the next day.
I sat next to her in what had already become our usual spot.
“Good morning,” I greeted and was answered with an uncommitted nod.
She didn’t look at me directly. I may as well have not existed in the moment for all the attention she paid to me.
Ouch.
The professor came in before any more could be said and the lecture began.
My attention was mostly on the woman next to me for the next two hours but her eyes remained trained on the lecturer. She only moved them to take notes.
When the professor announced the end of class, she immediately started to pack up her stuff.
I stopped her as she stood to leave. She looked at where my hand was on her upper arm like the touched offended her and I removed my hand, that look hitting me in the gut.