“To be honest? Your outfit is exactly what I expected of you.”
“What do you mean?” I asked.
“Keeping the conversation to the kids? Intentionally dressing down? You’re trying to make the appearance that you don't want to be here. That you won’t enjoy yourself. You tell yourself this is for the kids, but what you don’t want to admit is that you’re doing this for yourself. You’re going out with a man you morally oppose for several reasons so you try to make yourself unappealing to him. The shark circling you in the water.”
“Are you a shark circling me in the water?” I asked.
“No,” he said as he leaned forward.
His eyes were holding mine and I couldn't break the trance.
“I’ve already got you by the leg,” he said with a whisper.
I felt his legs trap mine between them underneath the table. But instead of wrangling out of his grasp, I allowed his heat to trickle up my leg. The hairs on the back of my neck stood on end as his hand reached out to take mine. His skin. It was electric. His touch was heated and his eyes were unbearable. It was like a train wreck I couldn't take my eyes off of, and the closer he got to me the more magnetized I became to him.
“What would you like to eat, Miss Emma?”
The dinner was bearable, at best. I was keenly aware of everyone staring at us as well as his touch against my skin. He had inched my jeans up with his toe and slid his foot out of his shoe. He was rubbing his sock against my skin. Just one barrier between himself and me. It was hard to chew. Hard to concentrate as he mindlessly rattled on about work.
We walked out of the restaurant with our fingers intertwined, and I could see the shock in other’s eyes.
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Oh, this wasn’t good.
His hand drifted to me knee as he silently drove me home. His thumb kept tracing mindless circles on top of my worn-out jeans. I kept telling myself this was a one-time thing. That it wasn’t going to happen again. That I needed to be relieved we’d gotten this out of the way. Surely, he was aware of the people who were staring at him. Surely, he was embarrassed to be out with the likes of me.
But when he escorted me to my door, there was a moment when I thought he was going to kiss me.
“I enjoyed tonight,” Ryan said.
“You did?” I asked.
“Did you not?”
“With everyone staring at us? Hardly,” I said.
“Not their problem if they’re jealous of the beauty you possess.”
“What?” I asked.
“You really are terrible at dressing yourself down,” he said. “Because you still look lovely.”
I was speechless at his words. His eyes danced between mine as he dropped my hand. He came up and cupped my cheek, his thumb running over my skin.
Electricity rushed down my neck as my knees began to waver.
“Have a nice evening, Miss Emma.”
Wait… he wasn’t going to kiss me?”
“You too, Ryan,” I said.
Then he turned and walked away, leaving me standing at my apartment door with the ghost of his touch against my skin.
I slammed myself into my apartment and pressed myself against the door. This was bad. Really bad. I didn’t need to be adding anything else to my life. I didn’t need to be adding anymore layers of drama to a situation that already had too many unknowns. But my lips were throbbing, and my cheek was tingling, and my skin was pulsing with desires I hadn’t allowed myself to feel in years.
I couldn't help but want him.