Ivy knocked rapidly, pulling me from my cloud of thoughts.
I opened up and she was complete with two boxes of pan pizza. She could read my mind, it was proven.
“Hey, how was your day?” I feigned my best smile, but she was still eyeing me.
“Great… yours?”
I shrugged.
“I met with the bride and groom, from that wedding. They liked my plans.”
“Oh, that’s good! When is the wedding?”
She got plates and cups out, I helped myself to three slices and some soda.
“Weekend after next. The rehearsal dinner is this weekend. They said I could bring someone, so you want to come?” She shot me a look as she sat with me on the couch.
“Sure, but you have to tell me what’s going on first.”
I sighed, I guessed I should start from the beginning, so I did.
“How could I have missed all of this in a week?!?” She exclaimed.
I just shrugged. I never told her about seeing him again because I thought it would make it too real. But she had been busy this week anyway, so I hadn’t actually seen her.
“But when I saw him today we had sex again, despite what I said. I couldn’t resist him…but he left angry. With good reason. He doesn’t want to get played again. I don’t know what to do.”
“Well it’s obvious you like him. So, you should consider his feelings, you don’t know what you want so don’t go to him again until you do.” She really was the voice of reason.
“I know. I want to be professional, but I want him too. And I don’t want to choose.” She nodded, understanding as she thought more.
“But this wedding won’t last forever? What about after?”
That would be ideal. But I still had to stay focused. On getting a new shop, getting my funding for it. Growing my client base. I still had Sasha. But she couldn’t float me forever. And I had my walk-ins. But I could have even more if I was in a better part of town. There was too much to do that couldn’t involve the natural distraction a relationship would bring.
“I don’t know, I still have to stay focused. My career has been exploding since that gala, I want to capitalize on that.”
“But you like him. He won’t stick around forever.”
I nodded in agreement. He wouldn’t.
“So, you need to figure out how much yo
u really like him. Maybe you’re even…”
“No, don’t say it. Please.”
She held her hands out in defense, dropping the subject.
“Well I’m here for you.”
I nodded, thanking her. I really needed that. Even when she brought it up I couldn’t entertain it. It would be too real and way too hard.
So, we just ate pizza like pigs and watched trash television. It was perfect. My hands itched to text Tristan. To at least apologize. I hadn’t realized how much I was hurting him and confusing myself. But it would just open the floodgates. He even said to only call him when it was about the wedding. It hurt, but it was what I wanted.
Wasn’t it?
Chapter Twenty-Four