As I take in the fact that Mako is who I should’ve been with all along. The fact that I was so close to having him is almost devastating. What would’ve happened if I had just turned around? If I had discovered the man making me feel things no man has ever made me feel. What would’ve happened if Amelia didn’t get sick that night, pulling me away from Mako’s arms? I would’ve let him take me home that night. I would’ve let him ravage my body and soul until the sun peaked through the morning clouds. And I would’ve given him my number and asked for seconds. Thirds, fourths, fifths and so on until I had him forever.
“Why didn’t you tell me sooner?” I ask with bewilderment.
“Because you were firmly under my brother’s spell. Telling you that wouldn’t have changed anything. And to be honest, I didn’t want that memory tainted. You hated me up until recently. If I had told you then, you would’ve spit it back in my face. I don’t think I could’ve handled that.”
Shame has me dropping my eyes to my feet. He’s right. And I hate that he is.
“I’m sorry,” I say. I release a harsh breath. “I’m sorry for the way I treated you, Mako. You were incredibly kind to me, and I threw everything back in your face. I treated you horribly, fuck, I even slapped you. And I’m sorry it took me so long to say it. I’m just… sorry.”
“Don’t be,” he says, taking another step towards me. I eye the distance, greedily wanting it to be completely erased. “That was what made me fall in love with you, River.”
Time stills. His words don’t register right away. My mouth falls open and my eyes snap to his. He forges on before I can even stutter out a response.
“I don’t want you to say it back. But it’s the truth. You’re so strong, River. You’re fierce and independent. And despite that fact that someone was actively kicking you down, you kept getting back up on your feet. I admired you for that. It pissed me off too, sure. But fuck, did it make me fall in love with you.”
Hot tears burn my eyes, lining the bottom of my lids. Waves of emotion storm through me, so many I don’t even know how to pick apart what I’m feeling. Shock, absolutely. But anything else I can’t decide. Am I happy? Excited? Sad? I don’t know.
What I do know is that everything I felt before Mako was a lie. Falling in love with Mako feels like stepping into a fire with his hand clasped firmly in mine. It burns, but I’m not alone.
“Come here, Mako.”
Twenty Two
Mako
I DIDN’T PLAN ON THIS moment happening, at least not now of all fucking times. Admitting to River that I’m in love with her just came out. But it’s really fucking hard to regret it when she’s staring at me like she’s getting ready to eat me alive. The heady demand slipping from her lips has me instantly reacting, listening to her command like a trained K-9.
I reach her in two big steps, or maybe it’s one and she took the other step. My hand is sliding into her soft curls and her even softer mouth is crushing into mine in one swoop. River McAllister’s lips on mine feels like fucking heaven on earth.
A shaky exhale escapes her mouth, swirling into mine as our mouths open and our tongues meet. Fuck, she tastes sweeter than I imagined. Countless nights, I fantasized about those lips on mine. On my body, and especially on my cock as I got myself off to thoughts of her. Too many nights doing the same thing, from the moment I laid eyes on River knocking the daylights out of the handsy asshole at the club. The moment her gold eyes landed on me, she trapped me in and made me hers. I didn’t know it at the time, but she never let me go.
A soft moan vibrates through my mouth as my tongue spears into her. I can’t get enough of her. I can’t stop tasting her. Her mouth is soft and pliable, letting me take the lead for a few moments before snatching the control away and commanding the kiss. Back and forth, we push and pull for dominance, never letting the other have it for too long.
River’s nails claw at my chest, drawing a growl from my chest that makes me sound like a hungry bear. The sound only spurs her on, her movements becoming desperate and needy. I snatch her wrists and pull them tightly behind her back, just like I do when I arrest a criminal.
Kissing this woman is criminal.
So many things I could do to her. I could handcuff her now,
letting her endure the sweet torture of what my tongue could do to her body and not be able to stop me. She wouldn’t want to, but she’d try when the pleasure becomes too much for her to handle.
“Mako.” The soft plea is murmured against my tongue, alighting an inferno deep inside of me. I snap. Or maybe I’m just answering her plea.
I pause, my hands grasping either side of her face, and I gently pull her away.
“Is there any place I shouldn’t touch? Or anything you don’t want me to do? I can be gentle, I can be whatever you need.” By the time I’m done, I’m positive I sound like a desperate fuck.
Her golden eyes glitter, and a small smile pulls at her bruised-kissed lips.
“I’m… not ready for anal play, yet,” she says gently. The why on why she’s not ready threatens to boil my blood. River had already admitted aloud what Ryan did to her. I close my eyes, coercing my dangerously rising temperature to drop back down before I boil over. Now is not the time to lose my shit.
“Okay,” I breathe, opening my eyes again. “Anything else?”
She gives one shake of her head. “The only thing I ask is that you don’t treat me like I’m glass. I’m not weak. I’ll never be weak. I just want you to be you.”
Now that I can do.
Before I press my lips against hers once more, I whisper, “Not for one second have I ever thought you were weak.”