And so he is. His golden green eyes stare right into mine and I feel like I finally have some strength back that I’ve been trying so hard to find. How this man makes me feel both strong and weak at once is a puzzle to me, or maybe it’s just a vampire thing.
Or maybe it’s just Wolf. Maybe this is just us.
I nod, suddenly so shy and protective of my feelings, wanting to cradle them close to me, yet I’m also worrying that the world will give me few second chances and I should let them all out.
“I missed you,” he says, even softer now, and I’m practically melting, holding onto the doorframe.
He’s at my side in seconds and he’s pulling me into him and I feel his hard chest against me, feel his heart beating underneath, like it’s trying to join mine. He cups my face with his hand and his skin is so rough and cool all at once and I feel so warm that it makes me shiver.
“I want to go back,” I cry out, tears spilling down my cheeks, and for a moment I don’t even know what I’m talking about, it all comes out in a rush, like a flood of feelings. “I want to go back to last week. I want to go back to Shelter Cove, with you. Before any of this happened. I want to go back so badly, so I can just be with you and so that mom is still okay and everything is okay and I just…I just…”
“I know,” he says sounding choked. He places his large hand at the back of my head and holds me against him. “I know. I do too. Last few days I’ve just wanted to turn back time and do it all over. Appreciate every moment of the before. Those moments before, when everything was the way it should be. I never realized how important the moments before would be.”
“The moments before,” I whisper against him. “Yes. That’s what I keep thinking of. How I’d give anything to go back to that place where there is no pain. There was no pain there, Wolf, and we didn’t even recognize it, didn’t even appreciate it.”
He kisses the top of my head and continues to hold me close.
“I’ve been so worried about you,” he says to me.
“Don’t worry about me. I don’t need your worry. It’s my mom who needs your worry.”
“I can worry about the both of you.” He pulls away enough to peer down at me and I am struck dumb by his gorgeous face. “How has she been? Lenore told me she’s really responding now.”
“I think so,” I tell him. “Every day it feels like a little bit more. I’m hopeful that the team will have good news. I can’t let myself think otherwise.”
He gives me a quick smile. “It’s going to be okay.”
Just then there’s a rap at the door and I turn around to see Lily, the nurse from the first day give us a wave.
“Hey Amethyst, it’s Lily. We met the other day. Just wondering if you’re ready for the meeting. We were thinking of having it in the ICU, but I think we can have it right here. I don’t mind standing.”
“I guess the ICU is a bit preoccupied,” I tell her. “Is that man okay? The one in code blue?”
Her smile falters a little. “He didn’t make it.”
I swallow. “Oh. I’m sorry.”
“Yeah,” she says in a drawn-out way, as if to say it’s sad but it happens. Then she looks behind her. “Okay, looks like everyone is here. Take a seat.”
Wolf leads me over to the couch and we sit down and the doctor I’ve met a few times, Dr. Seldrik, comes in, a personable woman with a strong chin, and then I’m introduced to the head neurologist. He has some Dutch name that I immediately forget, and his mannerisms are quiet and reserved, his eyes sharp.
This is so surreal. This feels like a dream. A very bad dream.
The doctors sit down and Lily shuts the door for privacy, leaning back against it and Dr. Seldrik gives me a placating smile and it’s that smile, plus the fact that the door was shut, that has my heart rate skyrocketing. Wolf can immediately feel this and puts his hand over mind, gripping it hard.
I feel myself go to another place, like I’m floating above the room a bit, letting the Amethyst below brace for the bad news. Because this is bad news, isn’t it?
“It’s been five days since Yvonne was brought in,” Dr. Seldrik says. “And usually we have a meeting about a week in if there’s been no improvements but with the most recent scans there’s some possibilities you have to be prepared to deal with.”
Oh god. Oh god.