They don’t react. It’s like they don’t even hear me. Resting my hands on my hips, I watch them, my focus zeroing in on the familiar blonde hair, willing her to feel my gaze.
Within seconds, she’s lifting her head, her startled eyes meeting mine, her mouth forming a little O, clearly in shock. We watch each other, the other three women talking animatedly, their voices rising, oblivious to what’s happening between Ava and me. How we’re communicating with each other, without saying a word.
Why did you leave me? I ask her for what feels like the thousandth time.
Why did you banish me from your life so easily? she says back to me, the hurt reflected on her face.
Fuck that, I’m hurt too. We both are. It’s pretty clear we’re miserable without each other.
But I can’t just let her back in so easily either. Right?
Finally, Jocelyn glances over her shoulder, doing a double take when she notices me. She nudges Gracie, who also glances back at me, her expression composed since she had a warning.
“Eli,” she says, sitting up straighter. “You need something?”
“Yes,” I croak. I wave a hand in Ava’s direction. I need her, is what I almost say.
But I don’t.
“Can we talk?” is what I ask Ava instead, my gaze fixed on her and no one else.
She watches me, so many emotions flitting across her beautiful face. I can read her like a book, and I know she wants to tell me no. More like she probably wants to tell me to fuck off, and I suppose I deserve that. I did her dirty, and I probably don’t deserve her forgiveness.
Damn, alcohol is making me see all my faults. This sucks.
“Okay,” she finally says, her voice soft. She rises to her feet and my eyes eat her up in that sexy-even-though-it-shouldn’t-be dress. The V-neckline offers me a glimpse of her smooth skin along with a hint of cleavage. And the skirt is short enough to show off her long, slender legs.
I clench my hands into fists, restraining myself from reaching for her as she approaches me slowly. Carefully. As if she’s afraid I’m about to blow up all over her.
“Privately?” I ask, inclining my head toward hers.
Nodding, she tears her gaze from mine and starts walking. Like the fool I am, I fall into step behind her, following her down the hall as she leads me into a bedroom. I shut the door the moment the two of us are in there, leaning against it as she turns to face me.
“You’re drunk,” she declares.
Nothing like getting right to the point.
I lean my head back, staring up at the ceiling as I chuckle. My vision swims. “Maybe,” I say with a laugh, though I have no clue why I’m amused.
This isn’t funny.
A sigh leaves her and I level my head, so I’m staring straight at her once more. “What did you want to talk about, Eli?”
She sounds annoyed. No, more like…exasperated. I’m sure she is.
Well guess what? I am too.
“You and me,” I say, not holding back.
But that’s all I say. My mind is swirling with all sorts of thoughts and ideas. What could I say to her to fully express what I’ve been feeling these last six months or however the fuck long it’s been since we called it quits?
“What about us?” she asks, crossing her arms. Going into pure defensive mode.
I decide to be truthful. “How could you toss us aside so easily?”
She gapes at me, her mouth hanging open, her eyes blazing with anger. “What? I didn’t toss us aside. You’re the one who gave me a shitty ultimatum and when I made my choice, you told me not to bother you ever again.”
I shake my head. “I didn’t say it like that.”