It had been a boy’s love, but it had been there. That feeling had been something he couldn’t stand the thought of losing.
One brow cocked over her eyes. “You loved me then? You should have mentioned it. I mean you’ve had roughly twenty years to say something. Also, what about everyone else you loved between then and now? It’s a lot of people, Ty.”
He wanted to tell her the truth, but he couldn’t quite make himself tell her what his life had been like before he’d come back home. He might never tell her. “I haven’t loved anyone but you. No one else.”
“No, you just slept with them.”
He felt his fists ball up in pure frustration. Would she even believe him? “We weren’t together. When I got back from college, you had a boyfriend. You seemed very serious about him, and so I tried to move on.”
“And then I didn’t,” she replied, her lips a flat line. “I haven’t dated in a couple of years. I didn’t see you asking me out.”
“I asked you out all the time.” Was she forgetting how often they were each other’s plus one?
“That was two friends hanging out,” Lucy countered. “I assure you, I didn’t feel like a girlfriend. What is this about, Ty?”
“This is about not wasting more time.” This was why he’d had a plan—to avoid a misunderstanding. He needed to calm down because he understood why she might be confused. “Luce, you have to know we belong together. I meant to do this when I got home but you had a boyfriend. Then when you broke up, I wanted to give you a little time. Then my dad got sick and my mom needed me and all the stuff with River went down. I’ve been stupid. I’ve let a lot of things get in the way.”
“You let a lot of women get in the way,” she accused. “Don’t use your dad as an excuse. I was there with you all the way. I went to the hospital and helped your mom at home. You didn’t look at me because you were having too much fun playing around with any woman who would let you.”
“That’s not true.” At least he hoped it wasn’t. He’d had a time in there when sex had been his drug of choice, something that let him forget that he’d made a hash of his life. “I will admit that I was depressed when I got home, and I thought I’d missed my chance with you. I let myself run wild for a while. I got a reputation, but I haven’t slept with a single woman since I realized I needed to try again with you. Not one.”
Her eyes rolled. “Sure you haven’t. And when did you decide this?”
“A year ago.”
She snorted. “You haven’t slept with a woman in a year? That’s not what I heard.”
Yes, this was why he wasn’t going to tell her that he’d come home from college a virgin. She wouldn’t believe him. “I don’t care what you’ve heard. I wouldn’t lie to you. You’re too important to me.”
Her mouth came open slightly, and it was like a lightbulb went off over her head. “A year ago was when Michael came down the mountain and started hanging out here at Trio. A year ago was when the rumors about me and Michael started.”
He didn’t like the accusation in her tone. He also didn’t like that she was right about the timing. “Sometimes a man needs a little kick in the pants.”
Her eyes narrowed in pure suspicion. “So you didn’t decide you wanted me until he wanted me.”
“That isn’t true. I always wanted you.” A little panic started to thrum through his system because this wasn’t going the way he’d hoped it would.
“Not enough to come after me. Not until someone else did. You’re a dog with two bones, Ty.”
“But I only want one bone. I never really wanted the other one.”
She growled, a deeply frustrated sound. “Go away. I’m not doing this with you tonight. The truth of the matter is you have nothing to worry about. Michael Novack doesn’t want me. Not that way. He’s just a nice guy who looks out for the women around him. He doesn’t want me any more than you truly do. I won’t be dating him so you can happily go back to your ski bunnies.”
“I don’t want to go back to ski bunnies.” He obviously wasn’t any good at talking. He’d been right the first time. Well, the first time he’d planned to talk to her, so he’d been right the second time. He moved into her space, looming over her. She’d responded to him when he’d kissed her. “I want you.”
Her eyes had widened, head tilting up. “You want to sleep with me?”
“I want to sleep with you but only after I fuck you so long and so hard you can’t think of any other man except me.” Going at her soft hadn’t worked. Maybe it was time to show her what he’d learned over the years. He might have gotten a terrible reputation, but he’d also learned how to be excellent in bed.