How is it that I can love him so fiercely while still trying to get to know him? While still trying to understand his twistedness—and my own? We are both equally as obsessed with one another. That’s dangerous. Fire we shouldn’t play with. But we grow more insane with each passing moment. Whether just talking or making love. Ripping at the sheets or sharing a candlelit meal. We are growing mad for one another. Yet… that feels more right than wrong. It’s as if it’s so wrong that it’s perfectly right; every couple should feel this way about one another.
I pace the library, looking for a book that might hold my attention, as I’m riddled with nerves. Ferro is a dangerous man. But so are my father and DeLuca. It just comes down to who is more cunning. Still, I hate knowing that the two most important people in my life could be hurt by Ferro or his men.
What will it mean if they catch him and end him? Will the families go to war again? Will DeLuca be pulled further into The Ruin than he was before? Will I lose the one man who makes me feel alive?
This brings tears to my eyes, and I must sit before I fall to the floor. Taking a seat in the wingback chair next to the unlit fireplace of the library, I sob into my hands. I cry over the fact that the man who vowed to protect me wanted me dead, and the man supposed to kill me is the one who makes me feel most alive, loved, cherished. It’s twisted and completely fucked up. And now that man is the only one I will ever want, and at this moment, he could be at the hands of the same monster who hired him to kill me.
“Arabella, are you okay?”
I jump a bit, Maxwell’s presence alarming me.
“Oh yes, sorry. I’m just having a hard time with all this.” I wave my hand in the air between us, but he knows what I mean.
“He is a very smart man, ma’am. I promise he will be okay,” he assures, coming to take a seat in the empty chair next to me.
“You promise? How? How can you promise something like that?” My voice showcases my desperation for him to be right.
“I do. I’ve never once seen him bleed.”
I huff out a small laugh at his comment. “I hope he keeps that record going tonight.” I blink away my tears, wiping at the rest with a handkerchief he holds out to me. “Any word?”
He’s only been gone for three hours, yet it feels like an eternity.
“No, ma’am. I assume they’re close to finishing the plan.”
I gulp, realizing he means the death of my husband. It feels wrong now to refer to Ferro as my spouse. He’s my betrayer more than anything else.
“Can you call him?”
“Sorry, I can’t. It’s one of his rules. He’ll call when he’s on his way back home. I’m not his driver tonight, because he entrusted me with your safety instead. But Sebastian is in the car at the ball, waiting to bring him home to you.”
I let out a sigh of understanding and nod my resignation, but he doesn’t miss the disappointment on my face.
“Why don’t you and I have some tea or something? Help calm your nerves.”
I look up at the gentle giant, and to be honest, I have to say I’ve grown quite fond of him. He’s so intimidating in appearance, but getting to know him has shown me his duality. He’s definitely a man who could snap your neck one minute and break bread with family the next.
“Sure. I could go for some tea. Thank you.”
He stands, gesturing for me to lead the way.
* * *
…
* * *
It’s near one in the morning when I feel DeLuca’s warm body slide into bed behind me. His skin finds mine. He and I are both naked, nothing but flesh and sheets atop the mattress.
“Mmm, hi. You’re here,” I say with sleepy relief.
He doesn’t say anything but a throaty few words. “Need you. Now.” With that, he moves us, positioning himself between my legs and lining his crown up with my entrance. All sleep leaves me then, and I whimper when he slides all the way to the hilt in one movement. Our eyes lock, with my hands cradling his face.
“Baby,” I moan, needy for this closeness. I sense his fear, his pain, his worry, and that tells me tonight didn’t go the way it was supposed to. I want to ask him what happened, but my lover needs me. Needs our connection as much as I do. Lifting my knees, I anchor them to his sides and allow him in deeper.
He moans his appreciation. “God, you’re perfect. Tight. Warm. Mine.” He praises me more as he thrusts in a hypnotic rhythm.