“So you don’t understand me?” He frowns.
“Of course I understand you. I just don’t understand why you’re saying this to me at three o’clock in the morning. I don’t understand why you’re saying this to me after you’ve already brought a girl back to your apartment. I don’t understand why you’re saying this to me five years after we did what we did and you dismissed my feelings for you like they were nothing. So yeah, I’m confused.”
“Oh.” He drops his head. “I don’t know. I don’t know.”
“Well, when you figure it out, come back and let me know because I’m not playing this game with you anymore. I’m not going to be your booty call or your side chick, or the girl you’re on and off again with.” I start closing the door, but his palm comes up to stop it. My eyes meet his and the determination in them makes my heart skip a beat.
“You were never a booty call or a side chick and would never be an off-and-on girl to me.”
“I don’t know what you want me to say to that,” I whisper.
“Say you’ll give me another chance.”
I shake my head. “I can’t.”
“Please.”
“I’m not looking for a relationship.”
“That’s fine. I’m fine with that.”
“So, what, you want to hook up with me?” I let out a laugh. “Is that what it’ll take for you to see we’re not meant to be together?”
“Maybe.” His eyes flash, a hint of lust.
“I’m willing to test that out if you are, but I’m telling you right now, you’re going to get your heart broken.” I raise an eyebrow, hoping I sound nonchalant when I feel anything but. I’m also hoping he doesn’t call my bluff. Maybe he’ll leave, maybe he’ll—
He pushes the door open wider and walks in, two long steps forward that make me take three long steps back. His gaze is set on mine, unyielding, and when he reaches me and brings a hand up to cup my face, I don’t move. His thumb caresses over my neck. I swallow, goosebumps spreading through me like wildfire. Bringing his face down, he kisses my lips. I feel myself sigh against him, my lips parting, my tongue ready to dance, explore, ready to let him do whatever it is he wants to me. I wish I wasn’t so pliant. I wish I was pushing him away or acting like this isn’t what I want, but that would be a lie because it’s all a lie. Every single thing I said was. It’s not his heart that’ll break, it’s mine. Again. For this, though? For this crackle and the fire that bubbles inside of me at his touch, I’ll take that risk.
We kiss like we’re trying to rip each other apart, like it’s a competition of who will get there first. I push into the kiss hard and he walks me back until my knees hit the couch and we’re both spilling over it, my back onto the cushions. I brace myself for his landing over me, but he breaks the kiss to catch himself and grabs my knee, opening my legs for him to step into. As soon as he does, I feel him, big and hard and ready for me. I meet his eyes again. This time, his hand cups me between my legs and his fingers begin to move against my mound. Sweet torture. My back bows off the couch, pleading for more. He delivers, sliding my shorts and panties to the side as his fingers slide into me, deep.
“You’re so wet.” He hisses, knuckle deep now, I’m pretty sure, since my eyes are rolling back and I feel him everywhere. “So wet.”
“God. Please.” I shut my eyes, panting, my hips moving against him.
I need this release. I need it. I need it. I need it. When I come, it’s fireworks underneath my eyelids and through my body, an explosion of pent-up energy and a release that’s years overdue. Not that I haven’t had sex since we broke up. That’s a lie. I’ve been with faceless men and we did bullshit things. When I open my eyes, Mitchell is looking down at me with an expression of complete wonder on his face. My heart skips again, and pulse racing, I grab him over his pants. He leans down over me, kissing me again, his lips bruising mine as I move my hand up and down, his low growl into my mouth pushing me to move my hand faster. He pulls away from the kiss and steps back slightly, my hand dropping onto my lap. He undresses and comes back to undress me completely, our clothes thrown in a heap across the room, the moonlight illuminating our naked bodies as he moves back and slides inside of me ever so slowly. I gasp at the feel of his girth, his length, his mouth on the side of my jaw when he bites me as he thrusts to the hilt.