It hurt her heart to see it. “Come on in.” She stepped back and allowed him to walk in.
“You said you wanted to talk to me,” Pan said as he sank onto the touch.
She closed the door behind her and took a deep breath. “I do. First of al,l I have to say I’m sorry. There were unforeseeable issues that came up I had to deal with. Things I needed to wrap my head around and accept before I was ready to talk.”
“Oh?” His brow wrinkled.
She longed to smooth the lines on his forehead out. “This isn’t easy. So I’ll just…muddle my way through it. I was never about you Pan. I love you. Nothing will change that.”
His eyebrows shot up. “You sure got a funny way of showing it.”
“It was never about you or us. We’re good, solid. It was about your lifestyle. If I could handle it. If I could be happy in it. The last thing I wanted to do was make you miserable, or break what’s working for you. I didn’t want to run out of gas years down the road and break your heart.”
“Because you’re not hurting me now.”
“I didn’t say it was a perfect plan. But for me, it was a necessary precaution to take. Can you at
least understand that?”
“Oh, I understand it. Doesn’t make it easier to deal with, Lark.”
“I know and you’ve been so patient.” She nibbled on her bottom lip. “I want to thank you for that.”
“Is this where you Dear John me?” He asked quietly.
“What? NO!” She shook her head and rushed over to kneel before him. “That’s what I’m
trying to tell you. You matter more than anything else. Being without you has been miserable. I barely managed to accomplish simple tasks. I wondered where you were, what you were doing and who you were doing it with. You’ve become a necessity like air, food and water. I didn’t want to admit that because in my life….People leave. Whether they want to or not.”
“You know I’d never go anywhere.”
“Not by choice.” She lowered her head. “Then I realized it didn’t matter. None of us knows how long we have. But If I get to spend every minute I have with you, that’s my happy.”
“You mean that?”
“Yes, I do.” She grabbed his hands.
“No more of this leaving shit?” He snapped.
She shook her head. “No.”
“I want this shit forever, Lark. Nothing short of my ring on your finger and my last name behind yours is going to be enough. Are you ready for that?”
“Fuck, yes. Was that a proposal?”
He gave a bark of laughter and scooped her up into his arms. Holding her in his arms, he nuzzled her neck. “If that’s what you want it to be. You have to promise me one thing, though.”
“What’s that?”
“We’ll never do this shit again...” he paused. The intensity of his gaze seared her. “…You’ll never leave me.”
Their gazes held. “I promise.”
“Good, then we should celebrate properly.” He stood with her in his arms and walked to her bedroom.
“Little bird,” Pan called out. He’d been trying to get a hold of her for a few hours. It wasn’t like her not to answer, so he’d cut work short and headed home. When she didn’t respond, his worry spiked. He jogged down the hallway and froze.
Lark lay face down on the floor in the living room.