No, he imagined not. Natalie’s resume was impressive.
“She will be a great asset to your work at Memphis Children’s,” Dr. Luiz continued. “You’ll be lucky to have her on your team.”
No doubt, but she wasn’t going to be happy.
Nor was the hospital in Boston, his research team, his office staff.
If he accepted the position in Memphis he’d miss his life in Boston. He already missed his life in Boston. He’d had a great life—a booming career, loyal friends, good times and a plethora of women to fill his nights.
His gaze dropped to the child in his arms. Everything had changed, and not for the good. He didn’t resent Carrie—he loved the kid—but he knew he wasn’t cut out for raising a little girl, knew he longed for the freedom he’d known just a few months ago, knew she’d be better off elsewhere. His mother, his sister, his extended family were all in Memphis. People whom he trusted to do what was best for Carrie. As much as the thought of leaving the job he loved in Boston stung, what Dr. Luiz offered was exactly what Carrie needed.
If he said yes, he would be hurting Natalie, would be snatching away something she desperately wanted and, in many ways, deserved. She wasn’t likely to forgive him.
Glancing down again at the sick child in his arms, feeling his overwhelming inadequacy in solely providing her care, Matthew admitted that being near his family would be a godsend. His parenting skills weren’t up to par, and so far his live-in nanny interviews hadn’t turned up a single applicant he trusted.
Had he been in Memphis he wouldn’t have had to call out of work today, wouldn’t have had to reschedule multiple surgeries that weren’t easily rescheduled, because he would have had family willing and able to help. How many more times over Carrie’s childhood would she be ill, have needs that would require an unexpected change to their normal routine?
He liked to think he’d been an awesome uncle, but what did he know about being a dad? About meeting the emotional needs of a four-year-old who had lost everyone except him?
Nothing.
Accepting the position in Memphis was a necessity.
* * *
“You’re quiet,” Dr. Luiz pointed out from across his desk.
Having gotten lost in his thoughts that he’d soon come face to face with a woman he’d thought about way too often over the past month, Matthew leaned back in his chair and shrugged. “It’s been a long day.”
It had been a long month. More like a long four months, during which his best friends had died and fatherhood had been thrust upon him, ready or not.
“But a good one. This move is good for Memphis Children’s, and from what you’ve told me about your situation it’s good for you, too. A win-win for all.”
It was a win-win all the way around.
“Except for Dr. Sterling.”
Despite the fact that she was technically being promoted, she wouldn’t think she was a winner. Not when she’d thought she’d be running the whole shebang.
Would she agree to work with him?
If she didn’t, if she opted to leave the hospital, perhaps it would be best. He had enough issues to deal with without adding in a sexual attraction to his new co-worker.
Dr. Luiz and the board had been all too willing to go along with nothing being said, that the whole deal be kept quiet until Matthew arrived. He’d made the request due to the concerns of his Boston colleagues regarding his research, that he needed to have things settled prior to any word leaking out of his relocation. Boston’s work would continue on developing the robot. Matthew had made sure of it.
Working in collaboration with the Boston team, he’d establish a smaller second team in Memphis, one that would implement use of the robot in its upcoming further expansion into in utero heart surgeries. With Memphis Children’s eager to expand their pediatric cardiology department’s capabilities, the timing couldn’t be more perfect.
“Natalie wants what is right for her patients. You being here is for the better of all.”
She’d likely hate him. He had enough personal turmoil. He could do without discord at work.
“She is an ambitious woman who has career goals. She wouldn’t be human if she didn’t resent my having taken what she thought was going to be entirely hers.”
Dr. Luiz’s gaze narrowed. “She mentioned she met you in Miami, but suggested it was a brief meeting. You sound as if you got to know her better than on a casual basis.”
Matthew’s comment to Natalie on the plane about knowing her popped into his head and his jaw tightened. “The entire conference was three days. I know very little about Dr. Sterling.”
Just that she’d smiled lazily when he woke her up at sunrise so they could watch the sun come up that last morning. That she loved the feel of wet sand between her toes. That she laughed at the corny jokes he’d told her, and that she thought strawberries were manna from heaven.