That’s about when the bottom started to drop out of the sky.
I laughed and started to run to my car, not caring in the least about the rain.
I loved rain.
Even more, I loved when the rain turned into a torrential downpour.
I loved it even more when lightning flashed and thunder rumbled.
It took me ten minutes to drive home, five to get dry, and two to send over Hastings’ file, leaving me with almost an entire night to do what I wanted most: read.
Most people wouldn’t like reading if it was their job, but I loved it.
I loved even more that the book I was reading was about murderers.
Why did I like reading books about murderers? I didn’t know. But I’d always had a bit of a fascination with them.
I was deep into the psyche of the murderer’s mind when I got a text pulling me out of the story.
Bourne: You play dirty. Still, don’t be a little bitch all your life and chicken out of the dating profile. I’m going to bother the hell out of you until you do what I want.
The bad thing was, I knew he would.
Bourne was a stubborn jackass like that.
Even worse, I’d promised him that I would.
Which meant that I owed it to him and myself to keep that promise.
Penas didn’t break promises.
And I’d be damned if I would be the one to start.
So, though I was engrossed in my book, I put it down and pulled up the dating app that my brother had suggested I use.
Then I started to write.
Wanted: Man to feed me Doritos so my fingers don’t get orange. No weirdos.
I highlighted that sentence and sent it to my brothers and their wives in the group chat that I was in with them.
I knew that they’d want to add their input, so I would allow it.
For now.
Too bad I had no idea that by doing so, I’d be giving the longest, weirdest bio for a dating profile ever.
CHAPTER 2
I would call my fashion style: clothes that still fit.
-Bruno to Laric
BRUNO
“Why Farmers Only?” I asked, wincing when I read the website’s name.
“Bruno, you have pigs. You’re a farmer. This is perfect,” Six assured me. “It’ll work out great. You can invite your date out to meet you at your farm. Y’all can go feed all of the animals. Then you can cook her dinner.”