"It feels like a dream sometimes."
"Yeah." I take another half-step toward him. "Was it like that for you?"
"With my father."
"With your brother?"
"It's different. I was supposed to protect him."
"It was an accident, wasn't it?"
He turns his back to me. Keeps his eyes on the task at hand. Locks me out.
Okay. That subject is a no-go.
I take a deep breath. Let out a slow exhale. "If you don't want to talk about it, I won't ask. But… you smile when you reminisce. It's a sad smile, but it is a smile. And he… I understand if it's still too painful to remember. But if it's not, you can talk to me. I like hearing about your brother. Your life with him."
"Thank you."
"That's why you can't stay here? The memories?"
The timer beeps. He pours coffee into two mugs. Heats a half-cup of almond milk in the microwave. "Yes."
"But the house isn't painful?"
"I'm used to it."
He pours milk into my coffee. Grabs the honey and a spoon. Steps aside to leave me room to fix it.
I squeeze a drop of honey onto the spoon. Lick it off. "Tell me to fuck off if you want. I will."
"That sounds like me."
I can't help but smile. "I know. You're vulgar. Well." My eyes flit to the couch. "Sometimes."
His shoulders soften.
"But don't lock me out. Please. I know we aren't lovers. But we're together for the next year. We'll be engaged soon. In a few weeks, right?"
He nods.
"I'd like to be friends, at least. If you need space, that's okay. Just tell me. Please." I turn toward him. "It's hard for me, being away from my family, my work, my home. Especially when you storm off and lock yourself in your office."
"Okay."
"Okay?"
"Would you prefer a different response?"
"No. Okay is… okay. Just not very dramatic."
"I can yell 'fine' and storm into my office."
"That would send some mixed messages."
He smiles. "I'll try."
"Thank you." I squeeze honey into my coffee. "I don't mind staying here for a while. It's a nice place."
"It is."
"But I… I'd rather go with you." I'm out of my fucking mind. I can stay in this sweet, ten-million-dollar apartment by myself, with my camera, a massive TV, a no-limit card, access to the finest restaurants in the city.
At the very least, I can take Remy out to a bar with good drinks tonight.
Or invite him here to watch cheesy vampire trash.
Why am I arguing my way back to his secluded castle?
Am I really that desperate to fuck him again?
Or is it even worse?
Not just a physical need, but an emotional one.
His eyes meet mine. "We'll be busy soon. Meeting Simon. Maybe even Opal."
"Opal?"
"My sister. Half-sister. She lives with Simon when she's not at boarding school. But she's a senior now. Almost an adult. I won't be able to shield her from gossip."
A half-sister. That sounds like an affair. Or some other equally gossip attracting situation.
"We'll be busy announcing our engagement. You should spend time with your brother while you can."
I take a long sip.
"It's up to you. I'm leaving after dinner. You can come with me. Or you can stay here."
Chapter Twenty-Seven
Adam
Danielle traces her mug with her finger. "Do you want me to come with you?"
I expect my head to scream no.
I expect my heart to beg for solitude.
The intimacy she craves is terrifying.
How can I possibly offer her the connection she's seeking?
How can I ever be enough for her?
"Yes." It falls off my lips with ease. There's no hesitation in my voice. No tension in my shoulders. No reluctance.
I want her with me.
Period.
"Oh." Her lips curl into a half-smile. "Good. I… I'd like that."
"I drove here."
"You have a car?"
"Three."
"Three?" She raises a brow. "Really?"
"I have a house and an apartment."
"You know you're ridiculous?"
I nod.
"Why three?"
"One for Louis."
"It's not his car?"
"It's a family car."
"Does he drive it when he's off?"
"Yes."
She considers it. "I guess I can count that as yours." She takes a long sip of her coffee. Lets out a soft sigh. "Why two more?"
"One for guests," I say.
"Seriously?"
"Yes."
"But you already have a driver. And your own car. You need an extra for guests?"
"The house is secluded."
"But you have everything."
"No one has everything."
"Maybe." She takes another sip. Turns. Rests her ass on the counter. "I've never driven a car. I've never even sat next to a guy I like while he was driving."
"Do you want to?"
She smiles. "I like the idea of it. Sitting next to you, listening to music, watching the scenery go by." Her cheeks flush. "It's one of those things I always see in movies. A sign of love." Her fingers curl into the counter. "I guess you're a little old for that."
"I'm too old to enjoy scenery?"
"To have sex in the back seat." She looks up at me. Rises to her tiptoes to reach for my hair.
I pull back, instinctively.
She drops her hand. "Sorry. I…"