“That’s just not possible. Everyone remembers their parents. Their childhood. You can’t have lost all of your memories.” He was the beginning of their journey. He had to remember or they had no starting point. So far, he was pretty useless.
She leaned toward him as if she could see into his mind by looking into his eyes. He still hadn’t quite forgiven her for having the blood of his family on her cards. She should have told him before he was with his friends. He almost viewed it as a betrayal. Maybe it was. She still wasn’t over him binding them together without discussing it with her first. She wanted in on all decisions, particularly the ones that would change her life forever. She really was upset with him for so callously bringing up the murder of her mother in front of his friends. She wasn’t over his betrayals.
They really knew nothing about each other. He could be so emotionless and she was all about feeling. That didn’t bode well for their future. She had the beginnings of a headache. Still, she looked down at the cards she’d laid out and heaved a sigh.
Three times in a row. There it was. The High Priestess. That should tell her something right there. This man, Sandu, the one that was supposed to be her man, thought he protected and guarded her. The High Priestess card depicted a nighttime scene. Sandu was all about the night. At its most basic, the card meant that she protected and guarded even if she feared what she was getting into. This was an opportunity for self-growth.
Sandu shrugged. “I have lived centuries without emotion or color and no hope of finding you. My memories faded fast, and it is possible I allowed it. Should a vampire manage to overcome my strength in those first few centuries, perhaps I didn’t want my family to suffer.”
Centuries without feelings, without experiencing emotion, Adalasia, he reminded softly. I was alone most of that time. Completely alone, until I was in that monastery with these men who were like me, too far gone to be let loose on the outside world.
Adalasia knew it would be a mistake to look at him. To really see him. You’re a stranger. A complete stranger. I know nothing of you. You don’t know me at all. I took you at face value, and I’m not willing to do that again. There aren’t excuses to just take from people. I might have given you willingly had you asked or talked with me. Had you bothered to take the time to get to know me and treat me like I was someone special, but you didn’t.
She had to ask herself why his betrayal hurt so much. She shuffled the cards and fanned them out because she needed the familiarity of them in her hands for comfort. Her mother had read her stories at night like most mothers read their children. Hers had been all about demons and the woman and her hunter partner who fought those demons, and together they saved the world. Each story centered around the couple. How he came when she was lonely. How they laughed together, fought the worst of the demons and survived every kind of battle thrown at them. The stories grew more exciting and adventurous as she got older. He was always there, fighting at her side. Her partner, treating her with love and respect.
You are someone special. There was that caressing note again. Sliding into her mind, over her skin, sinking into her bones. You are my only. I will make many mistakes, but never think I make them because I do not think you are special.
Adalasia tried to drown him out. She had counted on him. Waited for him. Believed in him. She had been prepared to send him away in order to protect him even though she was so lonely and afraid of those watching her. She had developed a fantasy of her prince. When she saw Sandu and he was so beautiful—a gorgeous, rough and dangerous man— she couldn’t help but be thrilled. He had seemed perfect. Scary, but she needed that. Dangerous, but she really needed that in a partner if they were going to battle demons from the stories she’d heard all her life.
Adalasia, you are not capable of holding grudges.
She tilted her chin. She did her best to shore up her defenses in her mind, to give him pure steel. I can hold a grudge forever. You don’t know the first thing about me.
I have been in your mind, ewal emninumam. You are soft inside, all empathy, while I am all hard edges. You carried my light that was in your soul for far too long, lifetime after lifetime, and having all that light, yours as well as mine, gave you that compassion and understanding.