“Promise me you won’t do whatever you were thinking of doing,” I tell him. “It’s a bad idea. I get why you’re tempted, but I don’t think it’s worth it, and I don’t want anything to happen to you.”
I rest my head on his chest, but all of a sudden, all I can think about is… what would happen to me if something did happen to Vince?
—
This time when Vince says he’s going to Joey’s, it makes me nervous. Knowing that Joey’s trying to convince him to do some stupid fucking thing behind Mateo’s back, I’m losing my enthusiasm about him. If he wants to get himself killed, that’s his problem, but I don’t want him dragging Vince into it.
Kissing me goodbye at the front door, he promises me, “Everything’s fine, don’t worry.”
I want to tell him again not to do it, but Mateo’s study is open and I don’t know if he’s inside. It’s far enough away that it’s unlikely he would hear me, but one never knows.
Once Vince is gone, as I’m about to walk past his office, Mateo calls out, “Mia.”
I brace a hand on the door frame, leaning inside. “Yes?”
Indicating a rectangular box in the corner, he tells me, “Your books came.”
“Ooh,” I said, rubbing my hands together in anticipation as I step inside. “Mind if I dig in?”
“Be my guest.”
I kneel down in the floor by his desk and attempt to get all the tape off, but I end up needing scissors. Once inside, I pull them all out, flipping through them one by one, fanning out the colorful pages.
“New books are so exciting,” I tell him, sighing happily.
For nearly an hour, I stay in Mateo’s study, flipping through books, reading when I get sucked into a panel, and telling him about each one. I’m sure he doesn’t care, but to his credit, he lets me yammer on anyway.
Adrian comes in while I’m still there. Understandably confused to find me in Mateo’s floor, surrounded by graphic novels, he stares at me for a moment before asking with a confused frown, “Should I come back?”
“No,” Mateo says, looking up from whatever he’s writing. “What is it?”
He glances at me again, then says, “I should probably come back.”
“It’s fine,” Mateo says again.
“But…” Adrian indicates me in the floor, like Mateo may have forgotten.
Mateo merely nods.
Still Adrian hesitates, but ultimately he says, “There’s a shipment coming in this weekend. I have dates and times I was going to share with you. A location. Sensitive information.”
Unmoved, Mateo steeples his hands on the desk and meets Adrian’s gaze. “So share them.”
More stunned than Adrian, I can only sit there frozen in shock, staring at the same page of the graphic novel in my lap, terrified to move, to breathe, to do anything that might remind Mateo of my presence. There’s no way he forgot I’m sitting here, right? It would be impossible. I haven’t shut up since I peeked my head in the door.
Of course, nothing Adrian says matters to me, but I feel like it matters that Mateo’s letting him say it in front of me. I feel… well, epically flattered, until I think about it a little longer. What if, somehow, this information leaked? Through some channel that obviously isn’t me, but Mateo’s mind would go straight to me in the floor of his office when Adrian spilled all the details. As mistrustful as he is, and with his record of having been screwed over before, I really don’t want the responsibility of knowing this kind of information.
Suddenly it hits me—is this the kind of pressure that weighs on Vince every day? Knowing these things and knowing what a mistrustful person Mateo is, is actually really terrifying.
It also occurs to me that since Adrian told on me to Vince for having the audacity to wear a bikini to the pool and be spotted by Mateo wearing it, he’s probably going to run and tell Vince that Mateo did this, too.
My stomach is in knots when Adrian finally leaves the room. I think I’m going to throw up, but I don’t know how to leave the room after that without seeming really suspicious.
Mateo glances over at me, but he doesn’t say a word before returning to his work.
I force myself to flip through the books for a few minutes, but there’s no more joy in the task. I’m a ball of anxiety, and I don’t know what to do about it. I guess I could tell Vince myself? Then if Adrian tries to tell on me, he’ll already know.
Of course, I’m not sure that would be sufficient. If he was convinced something was going on because Mateo made me serve him dinner, even I won’t be able to blame him for thinking something must be going on for Suspicion Incarnate to share with me sensitive information that could legitimately put them all behind bars if I told.