She wanted him, and while taking her right there against the counter flitted through his mind and tempted him greatly, he restrained himself from ravishing her for breakfast. Now that she’d had time to think on last night’s conversation, if things played out that way between them, he wasn’t going to refuse her a second time. He’d even made a quick trip to the drugstore early that morning while she’d been sleeping to buy condoms, just in case.
“Chocolate chip pancakes it is,” he said with a grin, and whipped up the mixture while she watched. He poured the batter into the buttered pan, then met her gaze a bit more seriously.
“So, the prepaid phone we bought last night is right over there on the counter,” he said, indicating the device she’d purchased at his suggestion so she at least had some way of contacting her mother if she cared to, without the worry of her whereabouts being tracked or traced. “I activated it for you, just in case you wanted to use it.”
“Do I want to use it? No,” she said a bit stubbornly, then sighed. “Should I be a good daughter and at least let my mom know I’m okay? Yes. So, I will.”
Her reluctance was palpable as she approached the phone, and while he finished up the pancakes, she turned on the device, typed out a text instead of calling, then quickly turned it off again. Clearly, Raevynn didn’t want to give her mother the chance to call the number back and listen to it ring.
“There, it’s done,” she said quietly, putting the phone back down on the counter.
“What did you tell her?” he asked as he carried their plates to the table, followed by butter, syrup, utensils, and a refill of his own coffee before sitting down across from Raevynn.
She shrugged. “I told her I was with you, because I’m a grown woman, it’s my decision, and I’m not going to lie about it. I also told her I was safe and doing just fine, but that I needed a few days away without being harassed or bothered, and when I was ready, I’d meet her at the hotel where I was staying.”
Collin couldn’t imagine having to constantly check in with anyone. He liked his independent life, the freedom to come and go as he pleased without asking anyone’s permission, and while he called his parents occasionally to see how they were doing or texted his sister, he never felt obligated to do either. But Raevynn had an entourage of people who looked after her, and if she went missing, they probably wanted details. Which she hadn’t supplied.
“I’m sure my mother is going nuts right now, trying to call the number back and not getting an answer,” she said, and ate a bite of her pancake. “She doesn’t like being ignored.”
He arched a brow at her. “Do I hear a bit of delight in your tone?”
“Maybe. Just a little.” She gave him an impish look as she ate half a slice of crisp bacon. “I’m feeling all kinds of rebellious right now, and I kind of like it. But I’m absolutely fine here with you, and my mother needs to learn that I need my own life, too, that doesn’t include her dictating my every move.”
He glanced across the table at her, meeting her gaze. Last night had been fueled with emotions on so many levels, but now that things had settled somewhat, he wanted to know what had prompted Raevynn to run away with him. It was a question he’d wondered since the moment they left the fairy-tale ball together.
“So . . . want to tell me why you asked me to kidnap you yesterday evening?” Even though he was fairly certain he understood the gist of her reasons, it had been an extreme act on her end to beg him to take her away from her chaotic life when she had enough money and the means to disappear on her own.
A half smile tipped up one corner of her mouth. “I suppose saying I was excited to see you won’t suffice?”
He chuckled. “I’ll take it, but I know it goes a lot deeper than that.” He took a drink of his coffee, wanting to be let into her head and her life. “I’m also assuming I just happened to be in the right place at the right time.”
“Yes, that’s true,” she agreed, her gaze softening. “When I saw you last night, I was overcome with this desperate need to just feel like a regular person, like I always did when we were together. You were like this lifeline I needed so badly, and I grabbed hold.”
He was humbled that she still harbored that depth of trust when it came to him, despite how he’d ended things all those years ago. “Lifeline from what?” he asked.
She shrugged and absently pushed the rest of her pancake around on her plate. “From this life I’m living.”
His eyes widened in surprise. “You’re not happy being a famous singer?”
She sighed and sat back in her chair, her expression introspective. “That’s a hard question to answer. There are aspects of my life and career that I love and that make me happy, but it’s not all the touring and performing and interviews and ad campaigns. Or even the obscene amount of money I’ve made. None of that brings me the kind of joy that it should.”
His shock multiplied. “No?”
She shook her head. “I’m living my mother’s dream, not my own,” she said, the words painfully honest. “You saw how it was for me growing up. My mother directed and controlled my entire life and decisions, giving me little choice in the matter, and like a good kid, I did exactly what she said, even though it wasn’t always what I wanted. And that need to please her just kind of carried on into me being an adult and her being my manager. And now . . . I don’t know who I am anymore.”
Her voice cracked on that last sentence, and Collin tried lightening the moment and grinned. “You are Raevynn Walsh, acclaimed pop star.”
“But that’s not all I want to be.” Sadness flickered in her blue eyes. “Don’t get me wrong. It was very exciting in the beginning. And even fun . . . until I was surrounded by agents and managers and teams of people seemingly pulling me in so many different directions, all for monetary gain. Then it became stressful and overwhelming and mentally and emotionally exhausting. And I’m not sure it’s what I want anymore.”
Her misery was so palpable it made Collin’s heart ache for her. “What do you want, Rae?”
“I want . . . normalcy,” she said, which was something Collin knew regular people took for granted. “I want to walk out in public and not be ambushed by paparazzi. I want my private life to be kept private, instead of my every move written about in articles and splashed across celebrity sites. I’m tired of living up to everyone else’s expectations. And the worst part? Even being surrounded by dozens of people on a daily basis, I hate that I still feel very alone and lonely because I don’t know who to trust beyond superficial friendship.”
He nodded in understanding, even though it was hard to imagine anyone living in that kind of bubble. “Maybe it’s time to re-evaluate everything,” he suggested, even though he knew it was easier said than done in her situation.
“That’s what I have to figure out,” she agreed with a nod. “All I know right now is that I need balance, and I need to be happy.”
Yes, she definitely deserved that. “What would make you happy today, sweet girl?” He wanted to see her smile, hear her laugh, and whatever her heart desired, he’d find a way to give it to her.