He nodded without smiling. Then he rolled over and threw his arm and leg over my body, pulling me closer. "I like that I can fuck you with no preliminaries. That you want me to when I need you that badly. It makes me happy."
We lay like that, not speaking, for a few moments. Finally, he exhaled.
"I'm exhausted," he said, pulling away, rising from the bed to undress. After we both brushed our teeth, we crawled into bed and within a very short time, Drake was asleep beside me, his breathing deep and slow.
In contrast, I lay in the darkness and listened to Drake breathe. In sleep, his leg was thrown over me possessively as we lay naked, spooned in each other's arms, my back to him. For the first time ever, he'd had an orgasm without making me have one. It satisfied me in a strange way that, finally, he'd dropped his insistence on making me orgasm twice to his one. He needed me enough to take me, focusing completely on his own pleasure. That would be something I would have frowned on only a few short months ago, but so much had changed in my life since that day I agreed to go to my father's fundraiser – the first one I'd attended since I returned from Africa.
Drake had changed me. I felt almost like a different person now. Stronger. More sure of myself. Sure enough to try things I never would before, to tell Dawn that we couldn't be friends until she learned to accept Drake was part of my life. Willing to give Africa another try.
Strange how being Drake's sexual submissive and lover had been the one thing that changed it all.
Drake had changed as well. Once, he was so tightly controlled, his life so regimented and rule-governed, keeping the parts of his life separate. Now, he wanted to be with me, all the time. With me, he didn't use D/s as a way to keep his emotional distance. He didn't have to tie me up to enjoy me, although he did.
Learning he had a son, that his son had cancer, and that his son's life may depend on whether he was a tissue match had shaken Drake. He was a man whose life had been suddenly turned upside-down – this time not in a good way. I was glad I was there to comfort him. I wondered how this experience would change him even more.
He was a father, but would never be able to actually act like one with Liam. Not until Liam was an adult and could choose to include Drake. Would Drake change his mind about his plans for his life as a result?
He didn't see himself as a family man for he'd never really had a family of his own. He didn't see himself as a father, for his own father had treated Drake with benign neglect. Women had always left Drake, starting with a mother who lost her first son to leukemia and who could never recover from the loss, even when Drake came along. Maureen left when Drake failed at being a good husband. He tied his D/s partners up and used them sexually. That, or he saw them as colleagues. Nothing more.
I had no idea what the future held for us. Despite our plans to go to Africa, for Drake to teach and work as a surgeon in Nairobi, life intervened. I was glad he didn’t have to cancel his teaching position. He didn’t need the income but he
enjoyed teaching. He had committed to helping with the hospital's neurosurgical slate and the delay in him arriving if he was a match would be a disappointment for them. Would Drake even want to leave at all now that he knew his son was ill and possibly dying?
I could only hold on tight to him and see where life with all its twists and turns took us.
Finally, with Drake's face nuzzled into my neck, I fell asleep.
CHAPTER TWELVE
In the morning, Drake slipped out of bed before I did, without waking me up, and was standing naked in the bathroom brushing his teeth. He looked delicious.
"You're up early," I called from the bed.
He finished brushing and rinsed his mouth. He came to the side of he bed and looked at me, his expression amused. "You were sleeping like a baby. You tossed and turned until pretty late, so I figured I'd let you sleep in."
With that, he leaned down and kissed me.
"Are you coming back to bed?" I brushed a strand of his hair from his eyes. He really needed a haircut, but I liked it when his hair was a bit wild.
"No can do. The oncologist called and left me a message. I have to get my test today. What are your plans?" he said as he retrieved his shirt from the closet and buttoned the top button, then adjusted his tie.
"I have absolutely nothing to do," I said, planning on surprising him with the painting when it was done.
"Don’t forget to take your meds. Even though we might not be going for a while, you should build up your levels. Text me so I know you're OK. Malarone can have side effects, especially for people who've had previous periods of clinical depression."
I nodded and smiled at him. "Always the doctor."
"You know it." He sat on the bed beside me and leaned over to kiss me.
I smiled when he pulled away. "I'll miss you."
He smiled back, that look in his eye. "I'm not used to having a woman in my bed. I think I should have woken you for a quickie. You look very delicious, lying there all warm and naked under my covers, Ms. Bennet."
"You should have. I might just have to look at dirty pictures on the web and do myself." I grinned at the look on his face.
"You'll do no such thing, you tease," he said and leaned closer, a look of mock affront on his face. "You are not allowed to masturbate unless I'm watching."
"What you don't know will please me," I said, only fooling.