My day was completely taken up with a trio of children who had come in from a school bus crash near Bournemouth, monitoring them and checking on each to ensure they had no trauma that required my immediate attention. The crash could have been much worse but luckily, the children were all fastened in due to it being a special bus for children in wheelchairs. Nevertheless, for the first few hours after they arrived, the pediatric trauma team and I worked hard to ensure that none of them decompensated and needed immediate surgery.
I was working with an excellent pediatric trauma surgeon, who made me think of my father, and it made me slightly wistful, wishing he had survived, and I could have gotten to know him as an adult. There were so many cases I could consult with him about, so many techniques he had perfected as a trauma surgeon in Vietnam and had developed surgical implements to handle. So many advancements since he had died.
But the past was the past, and I had to focus on the present, and enjoy every moment. I knew how fragile life was. I saw it every day, and it made me even more certain that I was the luckiest man alive, with a beautiful and loving wife who was totally sympatico with me sexually and emotionally. I had a beautiful daughter and I had a son, who I wanted to get to be a real father to eventually. What was there to be unhappy about?
There was one thing and I didn't want to let it bother me too much.
Even though the trial was months ago, and the publicity had died down, news of my past had reached the staff room at the Children's Hospital.
No matter what I did, it would haunt me -- that fateful decision I made years before I met Kate that almost cost her life.
One day, after a particularly grueling case, I stopped into the staff room for a coffee and a rest before my next consult came into the Emergency room. The boy I was seeing was epileptic and we wanted to assess him to see if deep brain stimulation would be able to reduce or eliminate his seizures, which were quite horrific. The parents had tried everything, but nothing stopped the chronic seizures. I knew that DBS was the last resort for the family, and I was hoping my investigation of his case and examination of him would prove he was a great candidate.
Not everyone was. It saddened me when I was unable to help a patient, but a child was even harder to take. They had their whole life ahead of them and it was tough to see them struggle at such an early age to do even the most rudimentary tasks other children their age took for granted.
While I waited for the family to arrive, I sat and tried to decompress. One of the nurses looked up from her small group of other nurses and gave me a smile. I didn't know everyone on a first-name basis yet, but I remembered her. Diane. She worked in infectious diseases and had several of her fellow nurses sitting with her. I couldn't help but notice how they leaned in when I sat at the table a few chairs down from where they sat. A giggle passed through them, and I felt eyes on me. When I glanced over where they sat, they glanced away and made eye contact with each other.
I knew what that meant -- it meant they were likel
y discussing the more salacious gossip and headlines surrounding my identity.
Drake Morgan, MD. Manhattan's Doctor Dominant.
I sighed and picked up my newspaper and left the staff room, saddened that I couldn't even come all the way to England to escape the fallout of the trial. I thought my time in Southampton would be free from any news or discussion about Lisa or her murderous ways, but I was not going to get my way.
I went to my office, and sat alone, brooding while I pondered what to do about it -- if anything.
Part of me felt that I should be open about it, admit what happened to my fellow staff members, and let the interest peak and then wane. I had hoped to go incognito but that fell through the first week I was at the hospital.
Now, I couldn't even go to the cafeteria without the nurses whispering and giggling behind their cups of tea.
My cell rang. It was Michael.
"Hello, Boss," I said when I answered, smiling because the thought of his smiling face made me feel just a little better. He was currently out of town at a conference, and I was holding down the fort for him while he was away.
"You're the boss when I'm away," he said with a laugh. "How are things?"
"Running smooth as a baby's bottom," I replied. "If it wasn't for the giggles of the nurses whenever I come into the staff room, I'd be a happy camper."
"What?" Michael said, his voice sounding alarmed. "Tell me who's giggling about you and I'll speak harshly to them."
"No, no," I said, feeling bad now that I'd burdened him with the issue. "It's nothing. For all I know, I had ketchup on my tie or something."
"I doubt it," Michael replied, sighing. "I heard a few of them discussing you in the line at the cafeteria when they didn't know I was in line behind them. They were titillated by your presence. They thought you were very sexy and wondered if you liked to use cuffs with or without lamb’s wool."
"Oh, God," I said and rolled my eyes. "That's almost worse than them thinking I'm a sadist."
"Don't sweat it, Drake," Michael said. "It'll pass once the novelty of your presence wears off. Once they realize how totally professional you are, and how you expect professionalism back from them, things will quiet down. I had hoped you'd escape notoriety while you were at the hospital, but I guess we had to expect news would leak out eventually."
"I know, but it was so nice living in blissful ignorance for a while..."
"Things will improve. When I get back, I can have a little staff meeting if you want, enforce order."
"No, please don't," I said and rubbed my forehead. "I don't want them to think it's bothering me. Just ignore it. That's the best approach. They'll soon stop when they realize how much of a boring old man I am becoming."
"You? Boring? Never!" Michael said with a big guffaw. "Now, hold down the fort while I'm away and you can take several days off when I get back. Spend time with your beautiful wife and daughter."
"Thanks, Michael. I appreciate everything you've done for me. I especially appreciate that you've accepted my past without question. This is the very best job I've had in my entire career and I want to keep you happy, so I can stay."