I laughed, because of course David would think it was a woman. "Yes," I admitted. "It's a woman."
"Hey, great. Bring her here, let me meet her."
"No, it's not like that," I said. "It's certainly not at that stage."
"It's at the take her to Bali and cancel a long-planned business trip stage, though."
"I know, I know. But honestly, it isn't like that."
"This is really sudden," David said, his voice sounding hesitant. "You were all down on relationships just a few weeks ago when we read the will."
"I know. Life moves fast. Sometimes, shit happens."
"That it does. Tell me that she's just a good fuck and you're not in love or anything."
"I'm not in love or anything. She's more than just a good fuck."
"Uh, oh. I don't like the sounds of that. You've been working like a dog getting everything in place for the opening of the new office in LA. The fact that you're willing to reschedule at the last moment is pretty telling."
"Let's just say we have an interesting relationship. Neither of us wants anything committed. We both were burned by cheating partners. We're only interested in something physical."
"That's what everyone always says, but then they fall in love. I've seen it happen way too often to know better."
"What about you?" I said, for David had many sexual partners and had yet to stick with one partner for longer than a weekend. "You have lots of sexual relationships. You've never fallen in love. Why can't the rest of us do the same?"
"Because you're not like me. You're the deep serious type. You don't do shallow. You've never done shallow. It's either one night or marriage with you."
"Well, maybe I'll try a shallow meaningless sexual relationship with someone else who wants the same thing."
"I give you six months before you're proposing."
I laughed out loud. "Not likely. In six months, I'll be with someone else."
"Yeah, right. I know you, brother. It's not in you. But you'll do what you want. Just remember who let you cry on his shoulder for a week after your last romantic fiasco."
"I'll never forget and you'll never let me," I replied, thinking of how I actually did cry on his shoulder one drunken night when I explained everything to him -- the whole mess. Me coming home early one day and finding Christie in our bed with her boss.
"Damn straight I won't."
"Look, I appreciate your concern, but I've decided to take a page out of your own book and try just a casual sexual relationship with this woman and we both want to go away and spend some time alone."
; "I get it. I'm happy for you. It's time for you to move on from Christie. Get her out of your system. You'll know you're truly ready to move on when she stops being the reason you do or don't do things."
"Thanks for the relationship advice," I said with a smile. "I'll be out there in two weeks, tops."
"Bring this woman. What's her name, by the way? I need to know who'll be my first sister in law."
"David!" I said angrily, frustrated that he couldn't just accept that my relationship with Ella was just casual. "It's not what you're thinking."
"Okay, okay. Bring her along anyway. I mean, if it's nothing serious, why not?"
"I'll text you with my new itinerary once the plans are finalized."
"Love you, bro."
"Love you back."