“We’re going to be working together a lot, Peyton, and living together, we should make time to talk.”
I don’t bother looking at him, how can I? Everything just keeps going from bad to worse for me lately, and if I look at him, I’m afraid I’ll break down crying. And the last thing I want right now is for Jameson to comfort me.
“Talk about what?” I sigh, resting my head on the window, not turning around.
“You know what. I’ve missed you, Fancy. For years I’ve been drowning, there are things that need to be said.” He grabs my hand, but I pull it away.
“We have nothing to talk about anymore, Jameson. If you wanted to talk, you shouldn’t have run away. But you did, and here we are. Judging by all the gossip rags you’ve been doing just fine without me dating your supermodel girlfriends or whatever. We might have to work together and tolerate one another for this show, but the minute it’s over, I want you to do what you’re good at and disappear.”
He grabs my shoulders, making me face him. “We both know that’s bullshit. When the show is over, you’re coming out to LA to record the album you were always meant to do with me. I know I fucked up, but I will make it up to you. We’ll save our talk for later, once we’re more settled in at the house and on the show. For now, all I can say is I’m sorry, and I still love you. I never stopped, Peyton.” He holds my gaze and god it hurts to look into those eyes that used to consume me and not want to get lost in them just like old times. Things are different now.
My jaw clenches. How could he still possibly love me? He was the one that shattered me.
He walked away and never even bothered to send me a damn get-well card when he practically killed me.
There is nothing he can do to make me forgive him.
Absolutely nothing.
Chapter 20
Jameson
The rest of the car ride to the house is quiet. After I told her I still loved her, she refused to speak again. I swear for a moment I thought she was going to kiss me, but it looks like I need to work on getting her to even consider talking to me. To at least hear me out about what happened back then. I know I done her wrong, but I was young and scared out of my mind. I had the opportunity of a lifetime waiting for me and I couldn’t pass it up. She’s wrong about one thing though. I did try to reach out to her and the moment I did Barb threw the wreck in my face and threatened to ruin my career before it even had a chance to take off. Maybe I was a bit selfish, but I thought Peyton would be better off without me.
Maybe coming back here was a mistake but I can’t shake the feeling deep in my heart that aches for her. That knows that we are
n’t finished. Not by a long shot. I sit back in my seat and give her some space. All I want to do is tell this driver to take us somewhere private and force her to face her fears and our past. That would only serve in pushing her further away. Peyton has never taken lightly to being told what to do.
The production company rented a private estate about an hour drive from the city. A gated driveway, fully staffed mansion. There’s a gym, sauna, tennis court, and pool. I think there is even a stable and private lake located at the back of the property. Everyone has their own assigned room. I smile when I see my name on the door that’s next to Peyton’s.
I go inside my room, leaving the door slightly open so I can hear when Peyton finds hers, and she doesn’t disappoint me. “You’ve got to be kidding me,” I hear her mutter, making me grin. She might want to get away from me, but I’m not letting her. I’ve spent enough of my life without her, fucking it all up.
I look around the room and notice it has its own private bath, I wonder if all the rooms are like this, the place sure is big enough.
As the day wears on more contestant arrive and the other judges. I grit my teeth when I look out my window and see fucking Viola getting out of a car. This is like my own personal hell of girlfriend’s past except I want Peyton to be my future. We are all supposed to go down by the pool for a meet and greet to get all of our housemates acquainted.
I change into a pair of board shorts and go down by the pool. Peyton is already dipping her toes in the water. I’m about to hook an arm around her waist and take us both over the edge when one of the other contestants beats me to it.
Water splashes hitting my legs and my chest.
I want to take this dude out for putting his hands on her, and I don’t even know him.
Peyton pops up out of the water, sputtering. Her hair is clinging to her shoulders but that’s not what has my attention. Her fucking white bikini is practically see-through, and I can see her fucking nipples through the fabric now that it’s wet. A low growl erupts in my throat when this dude goes at her again, pushing her head down underwater. I’m about to jump in and drown his ass when Peyton comes up again laughing.
She smirks at me then starts splashing the guy back. My jaw ticks, and I walk away before I end up in jail for assault. I find my way to the open bar only to find there isn’t any alcohol. What the fuck? I groan and take a water and start slapping together a hamburger from the buffet table. I hear a familiar laugh tickling at my ear. “Someone’s not happy.” Viola’s voice grates on my nerves even further.
“We have nothing to say to one another.”
“Oh, come off it, Jameson. I thought being here in this house might be good for us. I could come by your room later…”
“I’ll pass. Been there done that. No repeats.” I finish adding my toppings even though I’m not even hungry and stomp off to where Jace Cyrus is sitting with a few of the other contestants. All of them are watching Peyton and that J.J. guy.
“Wouldn’t they make a cute couple,” some chick says, and I glare at her. She shrinks back and stays quiet. I continue to watch Peyton. This industry will eat her alive of she isn’t careful.
Flashback
It ain’t about the clothes you wear