“Never better,” I lie.
I follow Courtney to the bathroom and as soon as we get in the door she spins around and lays into me. “What are you doing, Am?”
“What are you talking about?” I cross my arms over my chest.
“You. You know exactly what I’m talking about. Tate loves you. I mean he really loves you, Amaya. The guy would give you the world in the palm of your hands if you asked him to and you are just stringing him along.”
“I don’t need this shit from you right now. Don’t you think I wish I could give Tate everything he wants. Everything he deserves. I love him!” Tears threaten to spill down my face.
“Then what are you doing, Amaya?”
“I don’t know,” I whisper. “I don’t know…”
“Am,” she whispers softly.
“I’m not going to make a decision without talking to him first, you know this. That’s why I’m here this week. They want their answer in nine days, I’ve delayed them long enough and they need to know. I owe it to Tate to talk to him about it. If I stay, I’ll still rarely get to see him, Court. He travels almost as much as I do.” When I start to cry, Courtney comes and hugs me. “I love him so much. I don’t want to lose him. But you know this is my dream, it has been since we were kids.”
“I know, just spend the next few days with just you and Tate, forget about all this, and then talk to him. I’m sure he’ll be understanding, and he’ll help you decide.”
We redo our faces, and chat for a few minutes before going back out, just to make sure the guys don’t know we’ve been crying.
**
I wake up to the sounds of Tate going through drawers. I didn’t think he had anything on for today, so I’m confused. “What’s going on?” I ask through a yawn.
He starts and looks back at me with wide eyes. “Shit, Amaya. Sorry. I didn’t mean to wake you.”
“Don’t worry about it, I asked what was going on?”
He smiles so bright I want to jump on him. “I got called to fly to LA tonight, they set me up on some talk show about my career and life. So, I need to hurry up. My plane leaves in two hours.”
My heart sinks. “When will you be back?” I only have three more days here before I have to be back in San Fran to give over my decision.
“Just today and tomorrow, I’ll be home day after tomorrow at the latest. And then we still have a full day of just the two of us. I promise. This wasn’t something planned, I got the call at four this morning.”
This is what I was afraid of. Now on my last day here, I’ll have to let him know, let him know I’m leaving him, and fuck that hurts.
I put on a fake smile, wishing him luck, giving him a kiss, and go back to bed. Sinking down in the covers, I look at the pictures he has up around the room and I want to cry.
I could give up my career, my dream for him, but I would always be alone. I love Tate more than anything, but sometimes, love isn’t enough. He’s rushing around now packing, and was he even going to wake me up to tell me?
He leaves by giving me a quick kiss to the forehead. What on earth was that? I lay in his bed, thinking. Is our relationship really as strong as we thought? He was going to leave without telling me, didn’t really even kiss me goodbye. Hell, he’s barely even made time for me when he isn’t playing games or at practice.
After thinking for an hour, I roll out of bed and grab my phone
, hitting call on my mom’s name.
“Hey, sweetheart. Are you and Tate having a good week?”
“Mom.” My voice croaks.
“What is it? What’s wrong?”
“I think I’m going to accept the position.”
“But, what about your father and me? What about you and Tate?”
“I think Tate and I are breaking up. We’re just too busy in our own lives right now, it’s not working,” I tell her tearfully.